Post by The Delivery Men on Jan 26, 2006 1:28:06 GMT -5
(Lights up. We see a close-up of the Edmonton Sun, where the headline screams "DOOMRIDERS TRIUMPHANT AT JOKER'S WILD", with a photo of Kryenik, Deathrow and Illusion standing tall. The paper also has a smaller headline that reads "Conservatives Win Election." The newspaper is ripped right in hald, and behind it we see The Delivery Men tearing the pieces to pieces.)
DELIVERY MAN #1: It's not frickin' right!
DELIVERY MAN #2: We want our frickin' money back!
DELIVERY MAN #1: We're the most talented frickin' Tag Team in the NAPW!
DELIVERY MAN #2: Don't they frickin' know this?
(Cut to The Delivery Men fiercely driving their truck.)
DELIVERY MAN #2: We do more in the frickin' ring every match than the rest of the tag division has done in their frickin' lives!
DELIVERY MAN #1: It's time to make our presence felt!
(Cut to The Delivery Men sitting at Boston Pizza, listening to a droning D!)
D!: I lost my title and that made me sad and then D-X jumped me and I became angry but then my family didn't love me and that made me sad but the scar on my forehead made me angry but Khaos didn't talk to me so I became sad again until I found Predator and he made me angry--
DELIVERY MAN #1: (Jumping to standing.) DAMN YOU! Enough of your feeble emo bullcrap!
(Delivery Man #1 bicycle kicks D! in the face.)
DELIVERY MAN #2: Thanks for nothing, ya frickin' drama queen!
DELIVERY MAN #1: We're going on our own!
(Cut to the Delivery Men loading up a truck.)
DELIVERY MAN #2: I suppose the frickin' NAPW Tag Teams think we're easy pickin's now.
DELIVERY MAN #1: Because I got frickin' pinned by Kryenik.
DELIVERY MAN #2: With some kind of pin!
DELIVERY MAN #1: While frickin' Deathrow tried to blind my partner!
DELIVERY MAN #2: (Spits.) Deathrow!
DELIVERY MAN #88: (Walking up.) Well, if it isn't the--
DELIVERY MAN #1 & #2: FRICK OFF!
(Delivery Man #88 scampers. Cut back to them driving.)
DELIVERY MAN #1: Do you think phonies like Storm can hang with the toughest fricks on the Delivery Circuit?
DELIVERY MAN #2: Do The Decapitators think that trying to steal our match makes them good?
DELIVERY MAN #1: We tried to frickin' train them--they refused!
(Cut to The Delivery Men riding the roller coaster at W.E.M.)
DELIVERY MAN #2: THE ONLY THING CRIMINAL ABOUT THE CRIMES IS THEIR CRAPPY WRESTLING!
DELIVERY MAN #1: ANY TIME, DOOMRIDERS! ANY TIME!
(Cut to where they're advancing in a line.)
DELIVERY MAN #2: And the only thing criminal about The Dudes is their crappy wrestling!
DELIVERY MAN #1: And that just leaves D-X . . . the worst excuses for sweaty, overdressed clowns this or any fed have seen! When we get our hands on you D-X, you'll lose not only your titles, but your frickin' dignity, too!
STYLIN' KYLE: (At the autograph table.) Who should we make this out to, guys?
DELIVERY MAN #1: Delivery Man One!
DELIVERY MAN #2: Delivery Man Two!
BRUCE RICHARDS: (Signing.) "Thank you for your continued patronage. BBR"
STYLIN' KYLE: (Signing.) "Stay in School. Love, Stylin' Kyle."
DELIVERY MAN #2: We appreciate it! We've been in line for a frickin' hour!
DELIVERY MAN #1: And your time is nigh!
(The Delivery Men take their autographed glossies and leave D-X at the signing table. Cut to the streets of Downtown Edmonton, where they advance towards the camera.)
DELIVERY MAN #1: So in case you haven't frickin' heard yet, NAPW Tag Teams, we're here to make a statement!
DELIVERY MAN #2: About being the federation's most dominant tandem force!
DELIVERY MAN #1: We're in your way!
DELIVERY MAN #2: And plotting an alternate course might not help!
DELIVERY MAN #1: We're the Delivery Men!
DELIVERY MAN #2: Get ready to LOSE!
DELIVERY MAN #1 & #2: YA FRICKS!
(And they walk past the camera. Lights down.)
----------
With help from D-X and permission from D!
DELIVERY MAN #1: It's not frickin' right!
DELIVERY MAN #2: We want our frickin' money back!
DELIVERY MAN #1: We're the most talented frickin' Tag Team in the NAPW!
DELIVERY MAN #2: Don't they frickin' know this?
(Cut to The Delivery Men fiercely driving their truck.)
DELIVERY MAN #2: We do more in the frickin' ring every match than the rest of the tag division has done in their frickin' lives!
DELIVERY MAN #1: It's time to make our presence felt!
(Cut to The Delivery Men sitting at Boston Pizza, listening to a droning D!)
D!: I lost my title and that made me sad and then D-X jumped me and I became angry but then my family didn't love me and that made me sad but the scar on my forehead made me angry but Khaos didn't talk to me so I became sad again until I found Predator and he made me angry--
DELIVERY MAN #1: (Jumping to standing.) DAMN YOU! Enough of your feeble emo bullcrap!
(Delivery Man #1 bicycle kicks D! in the face.)
DELIVERY MAN #2: Thanks for nothing, ya frickin' drama queen!
DELIVERY MAN #1: We're going on our own!
(Cut to the Delivery Men loading up a truck.)
DELIVERY MAN #2: I suppose the frickin' NAPW Tag Teams think we're easy pickin's now.
DELIVERY MAN #1: Because I got frickin' pinned by Kryenik.
DELIVERY MAN #2: With some kind of pin!
DELIVERY MAN #1: While frickin' Deathrow tried to blind my partner!
DELIVERY MAN #2: (Spits.) Deathrow!
DELIVERY MAN #88: (Walking up.) Well, if it isn't the--
DELIVERY MAN #1 & #2: FRICK OFF!
(Delivery Man #88 scampers. Cut back to them driving.)
DELIVERY MAN #1: Do you think phonies like Storm can hang with the toughest fricks on the Delivery Circuit?
DELIVERY MAN #2: Do The Decapitators think that trying to steal our match makes them good?
DELIVERY MAN #1: We tried to frickin' train them--they refused!
(Cut to The Delivery Men riding the roller coaster at W.E.M.)
DELIVERY MAN #2: THE ONLY THING CRIMINAL ABOUT THE CRIMES IS THEIR CRAPPY WRESTLING!
DELIVERY MAN #1: ANY TIME, DOOMRIDERS! ANY TIME!
(Cut to where they're advancing in a line.)
DELIVERY MAN #2: And the only thing criminal about The Dudes is their crappy wrestling!
DELIVERY MAN #1: And that just leaves D-X . . . the worst excuses for sweaty, overdressed clowns this or any fed have seen! When we get our hands on you D-X, you'll lose not only your titles, but your frickin' dignity, too!
STYLIN' KYLE: (At the autograph table.) Who should we make this out to, guys?
DELIVERY MAN #1: Delivery Man One!
DELIVERY MAN #2: Delivery Man Two!
BRUCE RICHARDS: (Signing.) "Thank you for your continued patronage. BBR"
STYLIN' KYLE: (Signing.) "Stay in School. Love, Stylin' Kyle."
DELIVERY MAN #2: We appreciate it! We've been in line for a frickin' hour!
DELIVERY MAN #1: And your time is nigh!
(The Delivery Men take their autographed glossies and leave D-X at the signing table. Cut to the streets of Downtown Edmonton, where they advance towards the camera.)
DELIVERY MAN #1: So in case you haven't frickin' heard yet, NAPW Tag Teams, we're here to make a statement!
DELIVERY MAN #2: About being the federation's most dominant tandem force!
DELIVERY MAN #1: We're in your way!
DELIVERY MAN #2: And plotting an alternate course might not help!
DELIVERY MAN #1: We're the Delivery Men!
DELIVERY MAN #2: Get ready to LOSE!
DELIVERY MAN #1 & #2: YA FRICKS!
(And they walk past the camera. Lights down.)
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With help from D-X and permission from D!