Post by nexusone on Jan 14, 2006 6:58:28 GMT -5
(Rex in another MNF commercial taping is standing semi nude with his championship belt conveniently placed, covering his pelvic region.)
Rex: From the loads of email, to the phone calls received this week, to the angry fans outside the building, it's been concluded that the UPN show "Everyone Hates Chris" should have been about Chris Casino. I personally like Chris Casino, but him getting drunk in a bar not called Nexus One Sports Club, hurt my feelings. Come'on bring a guy some business.
(Rex sees the camera man waving him over)
Camera man: Your off topic.
Rex: What the hell do you mean I'm off topic...The NAPW paid me money to do this, and I'll plug my bar if I want to.
(Rex poses again)
Rex: Also reports show the fans don't want to see me dance, because the crowd is 75% men. But if the women speak up and email the hell out of this company, I'll be allowed to dance in the middle of the ring. Ratings generator baby. Rex Caliber.
(Rex tells the camera to move as he puts his pants on. Rex then looks extremely serious.)
Rex: Yeah.. I know this is fun to do, and I love being the fun loving, alcohol drinking, lady spanking, championship winning bad ass. I love having guys take me lightly because I'm the comedy act. But that comedy ends at Joker's Wild. There's a couple guys that say they'll injure my partner to get a our belts. Kyle Roberts and The Beast think they've seen the most ruthless acts The Crimes can do...Not a chance. I feel for the Dudes who will be like guys hit by stray bullets in a drive by. They'll be tears dropping as they get carted away, but no one will think twice about them after they see DX laying in a pool of blood. You can talk all the trash about us needing this, you being distracted by that. But you look at what we have done and what you've done. Dudes lost to DX. Dx lost to Dudes. But there's not a team alive that can say they beat The Crimes. Dudes haven't made this personal, but if they think for one minute they will take my belt, the one I finally won, send them a shrinks phone number.
(Rex picks up his belt and slings it over his shoulder then shines it.)
Rex: Monday Night come see Rex Caliber and Static... The Crimes. Simply put it should be against the law to be this good.
Rex: From the loads of email, to the phone calls received this week, to the angry fans outside the building, it's been concluded that the UPN show "Everyone Hates Chris" should have been about Chris Casino. I personally like Chris Casino, but him getting drunk in a bar not called Nexus One Sports Club, hurt my feelings. Come'on bring a guy some business.
(Rex sees the camera man waving him over)
Camera man: Your off topic.
Rex: What the hell do you mean I'm off topic...The NAPW paid me money to do this, and I'll plug my bar if I want to.
(Rex poses again)
Rex: Also reports show the fans don't want to see me dance, because the crowd is 75% men. But if the women speak up and email the hell out of this company, I'll be allowed to dance in the middle of the ring. Ratings generator baby. Rex Caliber.
(Rex tells the camera to move as he puts his pants on. Rex then looks extremely serious.)
Rex: Yeah.. I know this is fun to do, and I love being the fun loving, alcohol drinking, lady spanking, championship winning bad ass. I love having guys take me lightly because I'm the comedy act. But that comedy ends at Joker's Wild. There's a couple guys that say they'll injure my partner to get a our belts. Kyle Roberts and The Beast think they've seen the most ruthless acts The Crimes can do...Not a chance. I feel for the Dudes who will be like guys hit by stray bullets in a drive by. They'll be tears dropping as they get carted away, but no one will think twice about them after they see DX laying in a pool of blood. You can talk all the trash about us needing this, you being distracted by that. But you look at what we have done and what you've done. Dudes lost to DX. Dx lost to Dudes. But there's not a team alive that can say they beat The Crimes. Dudes haven't made this personal, but if they think for one minute they will take my belt, the one I finally won, send them a shrinks phone number.
(Rex picks up his belt and slings it over his shoulder then shines it.)
Rex: Monday Night come see Rex Caliber and Static... The Crimes. Simply put it should be against the law to be this good.