Post by The Assman on Apr 28, 2007 5:22:00 GMT -5
Fade in on The Assman in a British home, drinking a cup of tea. He has jeans on (as usual) and again, another printed black t-shirt courtesy of REBEL-Pro. This time it has the Mad Doctor and The Assman on it, with "TITS N' ASS BABY!" in large white letters. And here it comes: yep, you guessed it, a big grin as The Assman begins to talk. But just before he does, some of his family walks in: his parents, and his brother.
Assman: Tittylover, the match on Tuesday? That's like I said before, and like we both agree, a formality. But lets hope we keep it in the ring, a test of skill as wrestlers. But theres something else that this match is about.
He motions his family to come closer, and they all have the same big grin as The Assman.
Assman: The match is about family. And we are the TNA family. So let's act like family. No backstabbing, no double-crossing, none of that. Just some pure, 1on1 wrestling action. Just to help show the rest of the guys out there that we are family. We can fight each other, and still turn out as a team. These other Tag Teams in REBEL... Celtic Assassins?
His family let out a sneer.
Assman: They aren't a team. I'd like to see those two guys try and settle their differences the way we will settle ours, and still come out as a team. They aren't a team. They are two wrestlers stuck together - hoping to find some bond in the fact they originate from similar places.
His family nod.
Assman: The DOOMriders? The Bluegrass Mafia? These guys aren't teams. The Bluehrass Mafia are brothers. They are family. But they aren't a team. We see them wrestling as singles teams all the time, no help from each other, and in tag team matches? Disorganised and disjointed.
His family this time nod AND sneer.
Assman: And The Foundation? To use the words of The Mad Doc: "Those n*ggas are whack". They aren't wrestlers... There is no wrestling ability between them. They rely on destroying the opponents body using blatant non-wrestling moves. There is no skill on that team. I can't even understand how REBEL dare let them hold the Tag Titles. They have tarnished them by even being allowed to team up.
His family nod, then leave the room.
Assman: But we are a team. We are a family. And after this Tuesday is sorted, and we shake hands after the match. Whoever the victor, both of us will have our arms raised as TNA will be back!
Scene fades to black.
Fades back in
Assman: Oh, and Titty, I already have a perfect tour bus picked out for us. And when I've said before about perfect times for loving...? On our way to other REBEL shows or promotional events... or any time we use that bus? Those would be suitable times.
Fades out.
Assman: Tittylover, the match on Tuesday? That's like I said before, and like we both agree, a formality. But lets hope we keep it in the ring, a test of skill as wrestlers. But theres something else that this match is about.
He motions his family to come closer, and they all have the same big grin as The Assman.
Assman: The match is about family. And we are the TNA family. So let's act like family. No backstabbing, no double-crossing, none of that. Just some pure, 1on1 wrestling action. Just to help show the rest of the guys out there that we are family. We can fight each other, and still turn out as a team. These other Tag Teams in REBEL... Celtic Assassins?
His family let out a sneer.
Assman: They aren't a team. I'd like to see those two guys try and settle their differences the way we will settle ours, and still come out as a team. They aren't a team. They are two wrestlers stuck together - hoping to find some bond in the fact they originate from similar places.
His family nod.
Assman: The DOOMriders? The Bluegrass Mafia? These guys aren't teams. The Bluehrass Mafia are brothers. They are family. But they aren't a team. We see them wrestling as singles teams all the time, no help from each other, and in tag team matches? Disorganised and disjointed.
His family this time nod AND sneer.
Assman: And The Foundation? To use the words of The Mad Doc: "Those n*ggas are whack". They aren't wrestlers... There is no wrestling ability between them. They rely on destroying the opponents body using blatant non-wrestling moves. There is no skill on that team. I can't even understand how REBEL dare let them hold the Tag Titles. They have tarnished them by even being allowed to team up.
His family nod, then leave the room.
Assman: But we are a team. We are a family. And after this Tuesday is sorted, and we shake hands after the match. Whoever the victor, both of us will have our arms raised as TNA will be back!
Scene fades to black.
Fades back in
Assman: Oh, and Titty, I already have a perfect tour bus picked out for us. And when I've said before about perfect times for loving...? On our way to other REBEL shows or promotional events... or any time we use that bus? Those would be suitable times.
Fades out.