Post by Dr. Tittylover on Apr 25, 2007 15:21:50 GMT -5
A pimped out Impala cruises the streets of Steel City. Fuzzy dice hang from the mirror, zebra print seat covers add to the flavor of this bitchin' car. Green neon tubes bolted underneath the car flash in time with the bass of the speakers. The vanity plate says it all - Titty. He's bumpin' "Fire" by the Ohio Players and throwing gang signs to random white kids as he rolls down the street.
Tittylover: Sup playas? This is The Mad Pimp, Dr. Tittylover comin' live from sexy town USA bitches! I just want ya all to know that even though I didn't win that FFA title over in TEAM, I'm still the sexiest n*gga in the northern hemisphere! Not only that but I got me a match on may first against the ass-tastic Mike Trey!
Tittylover stops at a stop light and throws a gang sign to a car load of nuns.
Tittylover: (shouting) Westside N*ggas!!!!
The nuns cross themselves and the light thankfully turns green allowing Tittylover to peel out.
Tittylover: Mike I'm sore your ass is sore about what happened during our tag match. But damn N*gga! That hoe was fine as hell! Sure we lost but your the one who got pinned. If you wanna hate on someone hate yo damn self for not bein' able to beat those Celtic Cornholers by yourself. Damn crackers always hatin' on da black man. It's always our damn fault.
Tittylover makes a sharp right turn and runs over a curb.
Tittylover: But it's all good n*gga. Hate me but don't imitate me ya know? Dis Tuesday we got us a fight and n*gga, no one is more hardcore than the titty! But I want yo ass to know somethin', no matter who wins at the show I still want us to be homies. I want us to reform our team, Tits' N' Ass and win them tag team titles n*gga! We need to show these stupid racist kids runnin' round here that white people and black people can be cool with each other.
Tittylover stops at another red light and next his car is a police cruiser. Tittylover scoots down in his seat.
Tittylover: (whispering) Damn it's da man. I think they be followin' my black ass all 24/7/365. I told dem people I thought that girl was 18. Damn.
The light turns green and Tittylover slowly drives off. The Ohio Players have been replaced by Earth Wind & Fire.
Tittylover: Assman, we got a little scuffle to get to dis Tuesday. I'm gonna hit ya with either "the mothership connection' or maybe the "big stiffy" or....BOOTZILLA Biatch!! Either way dis Tuesday it's on like Donkey Kong n*gga! Weeeeeeeeestside!!!!!
aaaaaaaaaand scene.