Post by Simply Beautiful on Mar 25, 2007 14:40:26 GMT -5
“Lloyd is afraid of me. Good. That’s what I want. I want to see him beg for me to let him go. Right before I break his God damn neck. But not before he says those magical little words…”
SB walks down a lonely street, late at night. The rain is falling down in a light mist, and thin fog is spread out across the street. It’s comforting to him, he’s always liked the rain.
SB: SB: Sole Survivor? Heh, has a nice ring to it. But hey, I shouldn’t get ahead of myself just yet. After all, there’s twenty-nine other guys who all think they’re gonna be the one’s getting MY title shot. Let’s see, who IS in this match?
Bruno’s in jail, so he’s out. I don’t know who Rex could replace him with, but I sincerely doubt anyone he could throw in would have as big of an impact as Brian, especially in this state of mind.
Then you have the stables. The Kurtis boys – and girls. Lyndsey can kick some ass, I’ll give her credit. But she’s not going to be treated like the lovely lady she is in this match. Personally I’m not cool with hitting a girl, in any situation, but there’s about a dozen maniacs in NAPW that’ll probably get off on eliminating her. So she’s in the bucket along with Brian’s replacement. I got a lot of respect for Chad. He took me to my limit after all, I had to think up a move on the spot just to beat ‘em. But he still doesn’t have that killer instinct I’ve told him about. He’s become way too happy with just having talent – he doesn’t know how to turn it into success just yet. Soon enough, he’ll be coming after the NAPW Championship, for sure. But not on my night. Big Matt is in the same boat as him; he’s way more than just a hoss, but the guy needs more polishing. Sure they’ve been mega-stars in the States, but it’s another animal up here. So The Kurtis’es are done with.
The Foundation? Eh. Lots of sizzle, not much steak, if you ask me. Darko won the TV title by accident, and wasn’t all that keen on hanging onto it. Tom Young is a tough son of a bitch, but he’s already shown in the past that he doesn’t know how to function in Battle Royales – anyone recall his genius idea at Black Thursday? Jeff James was probably the host body from which Chad Kurtis was cloned, since him and Chad are like two peas in a pod – they just can’t get any big wins when it REALLY matters. And Dio Muerte’s name means Taco/Enchilada combo, I think.
I’ll hold off on the Untouchables for now. Let’s see, who else? Oh yeah, the new guys. Samurai Jack? No, that ain’t it. Safari Jack? That can’t be it. Oh yeah, Tijuana Jack. I think Newfy Jack wants his name/gimmick back. And then there’s that Gentleman guy. Sheesh, he can’t be serious. I think I found the one or two guys that Lyndsey’s going to eliminate.
Kevin Kodiak scares me. If he gets the luck of the draw, he just might take it down. The guy’s so determined. It reminds me of…well, the Icon, of course. But I have the feeling he’s gonna get himself overwhelmed and dumped out by a big group. Just ask Viscera, the poor guy is always a “favorite” but ends up being eliminated by half the ring every year. Nightmare is probably headed towards the same fate, as long as one of the fifteen or so guys he’s pissed off don’t get to him first.
Then, Rex has three special guys coming in. For his sake, I’m hoping they’re all pretty big names, or else the fans are just gonna shit all over it. Honky Tonk Man? PLEASE not again. And I really hope it isn’t Brad Rush.
Moving right along, we got Jo-Jo Malone. You know, I’ve had a right hook with you name on it for about, oooohh, seven months. You like hospital beds? Sure hope so.
Then we have the tag teams. People always say they like to team up in battle royales – bullshit! Steiner Brothers? Demolition? Cactus Jack and Chainsaw Charlie? All teammates. All kicked the livin’ shit out of each other in battle royales.
The Midnight Cowboys and Next Gen are gonna be barely clinging to life by the time they even get to the ring. Now, as teams, they’re both dangerous. But you separate ‘em, and what do you have? Clint is slow, physically and mentally. Stone can’t beat anyone without cheating, and somehow has testicles harder than Captain America’s shield. Santiago is too damn tiny to win, I don’t give a shit if Rey Mysterio won it last year, the guy laid on the freakin’ mat the whole time! And Sakai is unproven on his own, even if he did kinda kick Krenshov’s ass. Tommy isn’t even gonna have Billy in there with him, and that might work in his favor. But this isn’t a hardcore match. Krenshov’s a monster, but he’s stupid – i.e., he tried to get into a hand to hand fight with a friggin’ black belt, and he was eliminated by just ONE man at Black Thursday. That doesn’t bode well for him. His partner is English, and let me ask you when the last time England won anything of importance without a LOT of help from the States?
Bruce and Kyle are gonna kill each other. Honestly, I’m a little bit scared to see exactly what the (BLEEP) is gonna happen in that match. Bruce is a powder keg. Kyle’s a dick. It should be fun, but I doubt either one of them will walk out a winner in the Sole Survivor Match.
Sebastien Martyr has been turning heads. I should know, I’m one of those heads, after all. The guy’s so cool, so confident, it’s spooky. He has this unmistakable aura that just oozes out of him and surrounds him. But he’s going to find out, the hard way, that title shots do not come that easy.
Casino’s been quiet. Too damn quiet. But I don’t care; I owe that mother(BLEEP)er an asskickin’ four months in the making. He’s already in the poorhouse. I’ll put him in a God Damn hearse.
That leaves two men. SB. Lloyd Rees. By then, we would have already been through a war. But do you recall what happened last time we were in the ring together, Lloyd. I fought through the whole roster to get to you. And I dropped you on your ass, right over the top rope. It’s weird – adversity makes me kick ass even better, and even harder. Life’s been throwing a lot of obstacles in my way on my path to Sole Survivor. But I’m going to overcome. I’m gonna make you QUIT. And then, I’m gonna outlast twenty-nine other men to earn another shot at the gold.
Don’t call me the next D!. Call me the first Simply Beautiful – call me the the Sole Survivor.
Fade out, SB continuing down the street into the unknown concealed by the fog.
SB walks down a lonely street, late at night. The rain is falling down in a light mist, and thin fog is spread out across the street. It’s comforting to him, he’s always liked the rain.
SB: SB: Sole Survivor? Heh, has a nice ring to it. But hey, I shouldn’t get ahead of myself just yet. After all, there’s twenty-nine other guys who all think they’re gonna be the one’s getting MY title shot. Let’s see, who IS in this match?
Bruno’s in jail, so he’s out. I don’t know who Rex could replace him with, but I sincerely doubt anyone he could throw in would have as big of an impact as Brian, especially in this state of mind.
Then you have the stables. The Kurtis boys – and girls. Lyndsey can kick some ass, I’ll give her credit. But she’s not going to be treated like the lovely lady she is in this match. Personally I’m not cool with hitting a girl, in any situation, but there’s about a dozen maniacs in NAPW that’ll probably get off on eliminating her. So she’s in the bucket along with Brian’s replacement. I got a lot of respect for Chad. He took me to my limit after all, I had to think up a move on the spot just to beat ‘em. But he still doesn’t have that killer instinct I’ve told him about. He’s become way too happy with just having talent – he doesn’t know how to turn it into success just yet. Soon enough, he’ll be coming after the NAPW Championship, for sure. But not on my night. Big Matt is in the same boat as him; he’s way more than just a hoss, but the guy needs more polishing. Sure they’ve been mega-stars in the States, but it’s another animal up here. So The Kurtis’es are done with.
The Foundation? Eh. Lots of sizzle, not much steak, if you ask me. Darko won the TV title by accident, and wasn’t all that keen on hanging onto it. Tom Young is a tough son of a bitch, but he’s already shown in the past that he doesn’t know how to function in Battle Royales – anyone recall his genius idea at Black Thursday? Jeff James was probably the host body from which Chad Kurtis was cloned, since him and Chad are like two peas in a pod – they just can’t get any big wins when it REALLY matters. And Dio Muerte’s name means Taco/Enchilada combo, I think.
I’ll hold off on the Untouchables for now. Let’s see, who else? Oh yeah, the new guys. Samurai Jack? No, that ain’t it. Safari Jack? That can’t be it. Oh yeah, Tijuana Jack. I think Newfy Jack wants his name/gimmick back. And then there’s that Gentleman guy. Sheesh, he can’t be serious. I think I found the one or two guys that Lyndsey’s going to eliminate.
Kevin Kodiak scares me. If he gets the luck of the draw, he just might take it down. The guy’s so determined. It reminds me of…well, the Icon, of course. But I have the feeling he’s gonna get himself overwhelmed and dumped out by a big group. Just ask Viscera, the poor guy is always a “favorite” but ends up being eliminated by half the ring every year. Nightmare is probably headed towards the same fate, as long as one of the fifteen or so guys he’s pissed off don’t get to him first.
Then, Rex has three special guys coming in. For his sake, I’m hoping they’re all pretty big names, or else the fans are just gonna shit all over it. Honky Tonk Man? PLEASE not again. And I really hope it isn’t Brad Rush.
Moving right along, we got Jo-Jo Malone. You know, I’ve had a right hook with you name on it for about, oooohh, seven months. You like hospital beds? Sure hope so.
Then we have the tag teams. People always say they like to team up in battle royales – bullshit! Steiner Brothers? Demolition? Cactus Jack and Chainsaw Charlie? All teammates. All kicked the livin’ shit out of each other in battle royales.
The Midnight Cowboys and Next Gen are gonna be barely clinging to life by the time they even get to the ring. Now, as teams, they’re both dangerous. But you separate ‘em, and what do you have? Clint is slow, physically and mentally. Stone can’t beat anyone without cheating, and somehow has testicles harder than Captain America’s shield. Santiago is too damn tiny to win, I don’t give a shit if Rey Mysterio won it last year, the guy laid on the freakin’ mat the whole time! And Sakai is unproven on his own, even if he did kinda kick Krenshov’s ass. Tommy isn’t even gonna have Billy in there with him, and that might work in his favor. But this isn’t a hardcore match. Krenshov’s a monster, but he’s stupid – i.e., he tried to get into a hand to hand fight with a friggin’ black belt, and he was eliminated by just ONE man at Black Thursday. That doesn’t bode well for him. His partner is English, and let me ask you when the last time England won anything of importance without a LOT of help from the States?
Bruce and Kyle are gonna kill each other. Honestly, I’m a little bit scared to see exactly what the (BLEEP) is gonna happen in that match. Bruce is a powder keg. Kyle’s a dick. It should be fun, but I doubt either one of them will walk out a winner in the Sole Survivor Match.
Sebastien Martyr has been turning heads. I should know, I’m one of those heads, after all. The guy’s so cool, so confident, it’s spooky. He has this unmistakable aura that just oozes out of him and surrounds him. But he’s going to find out, the hard way, that title shots do not come that easy.
Casino’s been quiet. Too damn quiet. But I don’t care; I owe that mother(BLEEP)er an asskickin’ four months in the making. He’s already in the poorhouse. I’ll put him in a God Damn hearse.
That leaves two men. SB. Lloyd Rees. By then, we would have already been through a war. But do you recall what happened last time we were in the ring together, Lloyd. I fought through the whole roster to get to you. And I dropped you on your ass, right over the top rope. It’s weird – adversity makes me kick ass even better, and even harder. Life’s been throwing a lot of obstacles in my way on my path to Sole Survivor. But I’m going to overcome. I’m gonna make you QUIT. And then, I’m gonna outlast twenty-nine other men to earn another shot at the gold.
Don’t call me the next D!. Call me the first Simply Beautiful – call me the the Sole Survivor.
Fade out, SB continuing down the street into the unknown concealed by the fog.