Post by Sebastien Martyr on Mar 24, 2007 22:20:05 GMT -5
The following promo has been edited to fit the standards set forth by the NAPW. Several scenes have been deleted but the superstar involved has approved the final cut, to make sure it doesn’t censor his message.
(Bloor Street is again the scene. This time it is an adult entertainment club. The name of the place has been blurred out, due to the arrangement with the club. We see Sebastien Martyr sitting on a plush couch, surrounded by several women straight out of “Van Helsing.” Gothic or horror costumes are what they are wearing. Sebastien is dressed in the same black trench coat from the previous promo. Sebastien and his following are drinking Bloody Mary’s.)
Martyr: Ah, preparations are underway. Everyone is making this big buzz about the huge event. I came here to relax and that is definitely happening. Sole Survivor is a few days away and I am totally excited about it. I got goose bumps on goose bumps. Thirty men enter, one man leaves. I am the dark horse so to speak. Fan polls don’t have me anywhere near the top of the possible winners. Picking this is much like the NCAA Tournament... a toss up. That’s if you are a fan of course. Now me... I know who is going to be walking out winner. His name begins with S and ends with Martyr.
(Just then a big commotion erupts in the club. First edit occurs here, because of the nudity. A clean shot of the commotion is shown, and we see the owner of NAPW walking through the club. He has many women with him as well. He spots Sebastien and Sebastien is laser eyeing him. Rex walks over.)
Martyr: GOD HAS ENTERED THE BUILDING! Ladies give God a proper ovation.
(Rex smiles a bit, and asks Sebastien’s ladies to move. Rex sits down next to Martyr.)
Rex: God isn’t my name, man.
Martyr: Funny, I do believe you get signs all over Alberta claiming that “Rex is God.” Besides that, you mess with peoples lives as you see fit. You are indeed the God of NAPW.
Rex: Whatever man. What the hell you doing in a place like this? Don’t you need to be sucking blood from a homeless guy?
(Martyr looks over at Rex with a rather confused expression)
Martyr: What am I doing here? How could a God like man be caught sinning like this?
Rex: This looks to be a strip club, and Rex loves strippers. If a party is a happenin’ then I’m gonna be in the middle.
Martyr: Yeah, but unlike you... I don’t let women control me.
Rex: (He is looking at the girl on stage not shown.) THIS AIN’T THE LITTLE BITTY TITTY COMMITTEE.. ( He looks back at Sebastien.) I used to be like you. I’d come into a territory and shoot my mouth off, get some quick wins and look to make a spla..
(Sebastien looks very angry at Rex, and cuts him off.)
Martyr: (raising the tone of his voice slightly) Listen here, you will never be like me. I am someone revolutionizing the very promotion you own. I am creating a buzz that you couldn’t do if you wrestled here still.
Rex: Buzz? You are creating a buzz? You beat a few mid card wrestlers, and you think you have done something.
Martyr: So your tag team champions are mid card wrestlers? Well, you go tell Billy Kryenik that he is a mid card wrestler.
Rex: PUHLEAZE! That reverse babble bull shit don’t work with Rex Caliber.
Martyr: Don’t act like you don’t feel sort of small next to Billy. You did have to cheat to beat him. Kyle’s chair shot ring a bell? I know Bill’s ears still ring from it!
(Rex seems more than a little pissed off now.)
Rex: (raising his voice now) You a know it all, huh Count Chocula?
Martyr: What about the Dudes helping you win the tag team titles. It seems to be a pattern in those big wins you talk so much about.
Rex: Keep flapping those jaws, I’ll snap you in half in a second...
Martyr: Calm down man, I’d hate to get arrested here for Sacrificing the God of NAPW... Let’s talk about the other mid card wrestler then: Tommy Deathrow! Didn’t he beat you before?
Rex: Bringing up that ancient history... You ain’t nothing but a dime a dozen wrestler who thinks he can intimidate the Two hundred pound..
Martyr: Shithammer of blah, blah, blah. The way I see it I’ve beat him, and he beat you... that means I’m better than you. So you need to give Sebastien his due. I’m better than you are, and Tommy Deathrow is so beneath me he is shining my shoes.
Rex: You know what... I’m thinking you keep shooting that mouth off... Tommy is going to stomp your ass Superstar style, if I don’t kick it first.
Martyr: Your kicker broke? You don’t like me, because you know what’s going to happen to your promotion. Just like last year... someone you don’t like is going to win Sole Survivor. It took your best performance and Devastation, sick with a hundred four degree temperature, and flu like symptoms, for you to win against him. You are nothing. You let your best friend whoop you like he owned you. You lived in D!’s shadow the whole time you wrestled there. You think you can do anything different in REBEL beyond sucking like usual?
Rex: Man (BLEEP) you... Big man Sebastien, thinking he knows all my (BLEEP)ing history. Well mister history buff, go back and watch last years Sole Survivor and watch me capture the NAPW title... cleanly. I have done a lot of things you will never do.
Martyr: Sleeping with Kyle Robert’s old lady isn’t something I’d pride myself on.
(Rex stands up, and Martyr joins him. They stare down.)
Rex: You need to sign up for REBEL, so I can have a board meeting with your ass. I’d make you tap out...
Martyr: (interrupting) Faster than you did to Rees? Is that what you was gonna say? Well numero uno... You couldn’t ever make me tap out to those pathetic moves you do. Secondly... I’m NAPW exclusive. I have too many plans for this company to waste my time in other feds.
Rex: Yeah... Any excuse is better than none right? You are scared that I’d make you run back to Transylvania crying like a bitch.
Martyr: Yeah... you say that now. Tough man... But let’s talk about your campaign to get rid of wrestlers you don’t like. How about things like Kurt getting suspended because of a failed drug test?
Rex: Shit happens... and people get their due punishment. I’m fair and just despite whatever the hell you and the other asses on my roster think.
Martyr: You ever test Tommy Deathrow?
Rex: I don’t know.. Those tests aren’t done by me.. I don’t collect men’s piss. I get results and then I send the guys who (BLEEP) up home.
Martyr: Just tell the world that you have your boys took care of. You are no different from Malone.
Rex: I oughta slap you for general principle. You shoot off that mouth and you like stirring the shit pot don’t you? I don’t treat you any different than anyone else.
Martyr: What about Nightmare... you seem to harass him every damn show. You know I got more fairness in my pinky than you do in your whole body.
Rex: You act like you can talk to me anyway damn well please. I’m your boss, and I can be the most easy going guy you ever meet. But here you go shooting off at the (BLEEP)ed mouth and you pretend you deserve all the respect in the world, and shit might end up a little harder. I have a vision and it involves you getting thrown over the top rope and realizing that you aren’t the “caliber” of other guys in that match. You ain’t never gonna top the shit I’ve done... and you know it. Never done shit, never going to do shit.
Martyr: OHH... We going to play that card. Well yeah I haven’t done anything... YET! I could be a multi time champion in previous promotions, but I just don’t brag about my past... like some bald people around here.
Rex: If you had something to brag about you (BLEEP)ing would. I hear you talk about bloodying Chamberlain, pinning Carter and Benjamin.. You know good and damn well if you done something.. We’d know.
Martyr: That from a man who once paraded naked on television. How can anyone take you serious. I would never do a promo at my own bar, pointing at championships that I “used” to have. You are a guy who got lucky enough to never compete in a fed without me. If I had time, I’d go down to good old Carolina and kick your teeth down your throat, but unfortunately I don’t have that kind of time.
Rex: So you’re scared of the One Man Crimes Spree?
Martyr: The only crime you do is robbing the fans of seeing me main event each damn show. But luckily after Survivor, I’ll change all that. I’ll be the damn main event each and every show after I win the belt.
Rex: Big talk from a Gangrel wannabe. You can take your buck toothed bitches and get the hell outta of my sight.
Martyr: You want me moved... than be my guest!
(They both look ready to go. Rex takes off his suit jacket, but Martyr looks comfy in his jacket.)
Martyr: You were supposed to be this big legend. You used to be something in this promotion, but for the life of me I can’t see how. You are just a bald freak with no direction. You just think everything will be good, and nothing can harm you. You forget about all the losses and all the beatings you took... from guys I’d never get beat by. You never did get the proper revenge. You know why? It’s because you aren’t a survivor. You couldn’t withstand the cruel world of the NAPW, so you quit. You couldn’t take the beatings anymore. Rest assured if you was to wrestle here now... you’d be getting beatings still. By me, Rees, The Untouchables... we’d be whipping you every week. Hopefully when I bring some character and originality to the main events, we can get back on pay per view. I can do it Rex, but no one else can. No one else in that match can lead your company like I can. I give you that “it” factor NAPW hasn’t had in a long time. A legitimate character people hate, but still can’t stop watching. You know you need that...
Rex: What I need is for your goofy ass to leave. What I need is to look at the hooterlicious ladies. You want to throw hands boy, step down to REBEL and do things there.
Martyr: You scared to get beat down here?
(Sebastien’s cell phone rings and he answers it. He says a few words, and hangs up.)
Martyr: Unfortunately, you got saved by the ring. I’ll have to Sacrifice the mighty God another day.
Rex: Yeah, whatever... get the hell out of my house...bitch.
Martyr: I’ll show you bitch... come Sole Survivor I thrust my way into the main event. You can’t stop me... no one can. You will have to “survive” a long tenure with me as your champion.
(Sebastien leaves with his ladies. As he leaves, the scene stops due to nudity. It starts back with him outside the club.)
Martyr: That’s your big hero. A bald man with the attention span of a five yearold. I am ready to complete the revolution. I am ready to cross my bridge. Not a man on the roster, or in the front office can stop the only survivor in the match... Sebastien Martyr.
(Cut scene back inside. Rex is on the phone.)
Rex: Yo.. Pete, you wanna be more than intern? I thought so...Well you go find me some dirt on Sebastien. He pissed me off tonight, and I think he needs to get his past dug up. You get me that dirt by Survivor, and you’ll be hired full time.
(Rex hangs up and the scene stops. It pick up outside the club, where Sebastien is waiting. A girl exits the club and joins Martyr.)
Girl: He called a guy named Pete.. and he offered a job if he dug up your past.
Martyr: I knew he’d do something. Well... Which girl wants to prove loyalty to the Revolution?
(All the girls raise their hands.)
Martyr: Rex... You represent the old NAPW. I’m going to beat twenty nine men, and make this the New NAPW. You can’t have it your way. You have no choice. It’s all up to me: The Sole Survivor.
(Fade to black.)
(Bloor Street is again the scene. This time it is an adult entertainment club. The name of the place has been blurred out, due to the arrangement with the club. We see Sebastien Martyr sitting on a plush couch, surrounded by several women straight out of “Van Helsing.” Gothic or horror costumes are what they are wearing. Sebastien is dressed in the same black trench coat from the previous promo. Sebastien and his following are drinking Bloody Mary’s.)
Martyr: Ah, preparations are underway. Everyone is making this big buzz about the huge event. I came here to relax and that is definitely happening. Sole Survivor is a few days away and I am totally excited about it. I got goose bumps on goose bumps. Thirty men enter, one man leaves. I am the dark horse so to speak. Fan polls don’t have me anywhere near the top of the possible winners. Picking this is much like the NCAA Tournament... a toss up. That’s if you are a fan of course. Now me... I know who is going to be walking out winner. His name begins with S and ends with Martyr.
(Just then a big commotion erupts in the club. First edit occurs here, because of the nudity. A clean shot of the commotion is shown, and we see the owner of NAPW walking through the club. He has many women with him as well. He spots Sebastien and Sebastien is laser eyeing him. Rex walks over.)
Martyr: GOD HAS ENTERED THE BUILDING! Ladies give God a proper ovation.
(Rex smiles a bit, and asks Sebastien’s ladies to move. Rex sits down next to Martyr.)
Rex: God isn’t my name, man.
Martyr: Funny, I do believe you get signs all over Alberta claiming that “Rex is God.” Besides that, you mess with peoples lives as you see fit. You are indeed the God of NAPW.
Rex: Whatever man. What the hell you doing in a place like this? Don’t you need to be sucking blood from a homeless guy?
(Martyr looks over at Rex with a rather confused expression)
Martyr: What am I doing here? How could a God like man be caught sinning like this?
Rex: This looks to be a strip club, and Rex loves strippers. If a party is a happenin’ then I’m gonna be in the middle.
Martyr: Yeah, but unlike you... I don’t let women control me.
Rex: (He is looking at the girl on stage not shown.) THIS AIN’T THE LITTLE BITTY TITTY COMMITTEE.. ( He looks back at Sebastien.) I used to be like you. I’d come into a territory and shoot my mouth off, get some quick wins and look to make a spla..
(Sebastien looks very angry at Rex, and cuts him off.)
Martyr: (raising the tone of his voice slightly) Listen here, you will never be like me. I am someone revolutionizing the very promotion you own. I am creating a buzz that you couldn’t do if you wrestled here still.
Rex: Buzz? You are creating a buzz? You beat a few mid card wrestlers, and you think you have done something.
Martyr: So your tag team champions are mid card wrestlers? Well, you go tell Billy Kryenik that he is a mid card wrestler.
Rex: PUHLEAZE! That reverse babble bull shit don’t work with Rex Caliber.
Martyr: Don’t act like you don’t feel sort of small next to Billy. You did have to cheat to beat him. Kyle’s chair shot ring a bell? I know Bill’s ears still ring from it!
(Rex seems more than a little pissed off now.)
Rex: (raising his voice now) You a know it all, huh Count Chocula?
Martyr: What about the Dudes helping you win the tag team titles. It seems to be a pattern in those big wins you talk so much about.
Rex: Keep flapping those jaws, I’ll snap you in half in a second...
Martyr: Calm down man, I’d hate to get arrested here for Sacrificing the God of NAPW... Let’s talk about the other mid card wrestler then: Tommy Deathrow! Didn’t he beat you before?
Rex: Bringing up that ancient history... You ain’t nothing but a dime a dozen wrestler who thinks he can intimidate the Two hundred pound..
Martyr: Shithammer of blah, blah, blah. The way I see it I’ve beat him, and he beat you... that means I’m better than you. So you need to give Sebastien his due. I’m better than you are, and Tommy Deathrow is so beneath me he is shining my shoes.
Rex: You know what... I’m thinking you keep shooting that mouth off... Tommy is going to stomp your ass Superstar style, if I don’t kick it first.
Martyr: Your kicker broke? You don’t like me, because you know what’s going to happen to your promotion. Just like last year... someone you don’t like is going to win Sole Survivor. It took your best performance and Devastation, sick with a hundred four degree temperature, and flu like symptoms, for you to win against him. You are nothing. You let your best friend whoop you like he owned you. You lived in D!’s shadow the whole time you wrestled there. You think you can do anything different in REBEL beyond sucking like usual?
Rex: Man (BLEEP) you... Big man Sebastien, thinking he knows all my (BLEEP)ing history. Well mister history buff, go back and watch last years Sole Survivor and watch me capture the NAPW title... cleanly. I have done a lot of things you will never do.
Martyr: Sleeping with Kyle Robert’s old lady isn’t something I’d pride myself on.
(Rex stands up, and Martyr joins him. They stare down.)
Rex: You need to sign up for REBEL, so I can have a board meeting with your ass. I’d make you tap out...
Martyr: (interrupting) Faster than you did to Rees? Is that what you was gonna say? Well numero uno... You couldn’t ever make me tap out to those pathetic moves you do. Secondly... I’m NAPW exclusive. I have too many plans for this company to waste my time in other feds.
Rex: Yeah... Any excuse is better than none right? You are scared that I’d make you run back to Transylvania crying like a bitch.
Martyr: Yeah... you say that now. Tough man... But let’s talk about your campaign to get rid of wrestlers you don’t like. How about things like Kurt getting suspended because of a failed drug test?
Rex: Shit happens... and people get their due punishment. I’m fair and just despite whatever the hell you and the other asses on my roster think.
Martyr: You ever test Tommy Deathrow?
Rex: I don’t know.. Those tests aren’t done by me.. I don’t collect men’s piss. I get results and then I send the guys who (BLEEP) up home.
Martyr: Just tell the world that you have your boys took care of. You are no different from Malone.
Rex: I oughta slap you for general principle. You shoot off that mouth and you like stirring the shit pot don’t you? I don’t treat you any different than anyone else.
Martyr: What about Nightmare... you seem to harass him every damn show. You know I got more fairness in my pinky than you do in your whole body.
Rex: You act like you can talk to me anyway damn well please. I’m your boss, and I can be the most easy going guy you ever meet. But here you go shooting off at the (BLEEP)ed mouth and you pretend you deserve all the respect in the world, and shit might end up a little harder. I have a vision and it involves you getting thrown over the top rope and realizing that you aren’t the “caliber” of other guys in that match. You ain’t never gonna top the shit I’ve done... and you know it. Never done shit, never going to do shit.
Martyr: OHH... We going to play that card. Well yeah I haven’t done anything... YET! I could be a multi time champion in previous promotions, but I just don’t brag about my past... like some bald people around here.
Rex: If you had something to brag about you (BLEEP)ing would. I hear you talk about bloodying Chamberlain, pinning Carter and Benjamin.. You know good and damn well if you done something.. We’d know.
Martyr: That from a man who once paraded naked on television. How can anyone take you serious. I would never do a promo at my own bar, pointing at championships that I “used” to have. You are a guy who got lucky enough to never compete in a fed without me. If I had time, I’d go down to good old Carolina and kick your teeth down your throat, but unfortunately I don’t have that kind of time.
Rex: So you’re scared of the One Man Crimes Spree?
Martyr: The only crime you do is robbing the fans of seeing me main event each damn show. But luckily after Survivor, I’ll change all that. I’ll be the damn main event each and every show after I win the belt.
Rex: Big talk from a Gangrel wannabe. You can take your buck toothed bitches and get the hell outta of my sight.
Martyr: You want me moved... than be my guest!
(They both look ready to go. Rex takes off his suit jacket, but Martyr looks comfy in his jacket.)
Martyr: You were supposed to be this big legend. You used to be something in this promotion, but for the life of me I can’t see how. You are just a bald freak with no direction. You just think everything will be good, and nothing can harm you. You forget about all the losses and all the beatings you took... from guys I’d never get beat by. You never did get the proper revenge. You know why? It’s because you aren’t a survivor. You couldn’t withstand the cruel world of the NAPW, so you quit. You couldn’t take the beatings anymore. Rest assured if you was to wrestle here now... you’d be getting beatings still. By me, Rees, The Untouchables... we’d be whipping you every week. Hopefully when I bring some character and originality to the main events, we can get back on pay per view. I can do it Rex, but no one else can. No one else in that match can lead your company like I can. I give you that “it” factor NAPW hasn’t had in a long time. A legitimate character people hate, but still can’t stop watching. You know you need that...
Rex: What I need is for your goofy ass to leave. What I need is to look at the hooterlicious ladies. You want to throw hands boy, step down to REBEL and do things there.
Martyr: You scared to get beat down here?
(Sebastien’s cell phone rings and he answers it. He says a few words, and hangs up.)
Martyr: Unfortunately, you got saved by the ring. I’ll have to Sacrifice the mighty God another day.
Rex: Yeah, whatever... get the hell out of my house...bitch.
Martyr: I’ll show you bitch... come Sole Survivor I thrust my way into the main event. You can’t stop me... no one can. You will have to “survive” a long tenure with me as your champion.
(Sebastien leaves with his ladies. As he leaves, the scene stops due to nudity. It starts back with him outside the club.)
Martyr: That’s your big hero. A bald man with the attention span of a five yearold. I am ready to complete the revolution. I am ready to cross my bridge. Not a man on the roster, or in the front office can stop the only survivor in the match... Sebastien Martyr.
(Cut scene back inside. Rex is on the phone.)
Rex: Yo.. Pete, you wanna be more than intern? I thought so...Well you go find me some dirt on Sebastien. He pissed me off tonight, and I think he needs to get his past dug up. You get me that dirt by Survivor, and you’ll be hired full time.
(Rex hangs up and the scene stops. It pick up outside the club, where Sebastien is waiting. A girl exits the club and joins Martyr.)
Girl: He called a guy named Pete.. and he offered a job if he dug up your past.
Martyr: I knew he’d do something. Well... Which girl wants to prove loyalty to the Revolution?
(All the girls raise their hands.)
Martyr: Rex... You represent the old NAPW. I’m going to beat twenty nine men, and make this the New NAPW. You can’t have it your way. You have no choice. It’s all up to me: The Sole Survivor.
(Fade to black.)