Post by Jay O'Brien on Mar 7, 2007 13:52:58 GMT -5
[Start.]
[Kenny Krenshov is your tag team partner. But he’s six-nine.]
[Kenny Krenshov is your stablemate. But he’s three hundred and sixty eight pounds.]
[Kenny Krenshov is your friend, but he’s a giant former jailbird with a nasty temperament and a very short fuse.]
[You’re meeting Kenny Krenshov to talk shop, to discuss the future, but you are crapping your pants. I mean, this guy is verging on psychopathic. You just saw him run through seven other men in a battle royal, and the week before he tossed The Famous Monsters of Hollyweird about like rag dolls. Even you felt bad for them.]
[But as much as you felt bad for them, you were far more relieved you weren’t them. If anybody ever felt like asking Jay O’Brien to re-address the reasons he joined forces with Kenny Krenshov, Kurt Castle and Chris Casino in the first place, then all he’d have to do is relay to them what he saw Tuesday night, first hand, up close and personal. He saw a monster in the prime of his career tearing people apart with absolutely no regard for anything or anyone. Except Jay.]
[The sheer relief can be summed up in one single word: Damn… Sorry Ron Simmons, but it had to be said.]
“Come on, he can’t be that scary.”
[Andy. Jay gives him the kind of look that just says “What the HELL do you know”?]
JOB: Have you seen Kenny Krenshov in person?
AOB: No, but...
JOB: “The Colossal” Kenny Krenshov?
AOB: I’ve seen him on TV!
JOB: Did you shit your pants?
AOB: No...
JOB: Then believe me, it does not do the man justice.
[Andy shrugs. Hey, he’s a former wrestler himself, he’s seen big guys before. He’s wrestled big guys before, and damn it, he’s even beaten big guys before. He’s not convinced.]
AOB: I bet you I ain’t impressed.
[Jay just laughs.]
AOB: What!? You saying I’m gonna be scared of that big goof!? Just because he’s (in his most sarcastic voice) six-nine, three-sixty? You know who you’re talking to, Jay? I’m AWESOME ANDY.
JOB: You’re an (BLEEP).
AOB: Hey --- just remember who’s doing who the favour here.
JOB: Oh, don’t worry. I know where we stand, and I know what I owe you. Andy, I don’t owe you a thing.
AOB: Oh really? Because, you know, I could easily revoke my help with your application for US citizenship...
[Jay glares at Andy. And if looks could kill...]
AOB: Then again… But hey, hey, you want to represent North American Pro Wrestling? Dude, you gotta lose the Britishness.
JOB: I’m aware of that.
AOB: Yeah. Yeah, or you’d be facing Kenny Krenshov in a week’s time when the Untouchables kick you to the curb.
JOB: That won’t happen. Because you won’t revoke your help. Because the moment you do, Andy, you’re on the first flight back to England, bags packed, within five minutes. Okay?
AOB: Whatever.
[Andy shrugs.]
[And then, a knock on the door...]
[Andy sits up straight. Jay stands. He makes his way to the door, and opens it. Eli Potts.]
ELI: Jay! Great to see you!
JOB: Yeah, hey, Eli, what’s up. Whe, where’s Kenny?
ELI: He’s just grabbing a few things from the trunk of the car.
[Woah, woah... lost in translation.]
AOB: Trunk?
JOB: Boot, Andy.
AOB: Ahh... Damn yanks.
[Eli GLARES at Andy.]
ELI: What’s he doing here?
JOB: Honestly, sometimes I ask myself that question.
[Andy sneers.]
ELI: Ah, here’s Kenny now. Shall we?
[Jay steps aside as Eli Potts enters the room, followed by “The Colossal” Kenny Krenshov. And just like Jay promised, the mere sight of this monster is enough to take the wind out of Andy’s sails. Immediately, he jumps up and extends his hand. This is a man you want on your side!]
[Kenny just looks at Andy’s hand.]
KENNY: And you are?
AOB: Err, I, I’m Andy... “Awes---”... err... Andy O’Brien. Jay’s brother.
[Kenny laughs. Jay motions for him to take a seat. He obliges.]
JOB: So, Kenny... I need to say, I’m... sorry.
KENNY: Sorry?
JOB: About the battle royal... eliminated by a woman... I mean, Christ, I fared no better than Lex freakin’ Vain...
KENNY: We’ll avenge that.
[The room falls into an awkward silence. God good, this guy is threatening.]
ELI: Don’t worry about it, Jay, everybody gets caught wanting every now and then. What matters is the future – the future of the Untouchables.
[Jay nods.]
ELI: That’s why, this week, we need to win that eight man tag, whether those… ugh... Cowboys co operate with us or not.
JOB: Right, right. I promise, I won’t let you down again.
[Eli smiles. It’s almost warm. Almost.]
ELI: All is rosy in the Untouchables garden so long as we don’t let ourselves get complacent. NAPW is ours for the taking.
KENNY: I’ll even take care of those four myself if I have to.
JOB: That... that won’t be necessary. I’m here, I’m ready, and I’m willing. I’ll pull my weight from now on. And I got business to take care of with that Lyndsey Valentine bitch, too.
ELI: Good… Now then, down to business. Your application for US citizenship?
JOB: That’ll take a few weeks to clear, but it should be okay thanks to ---
AOB: ME! Hey, you can thank me later if you like, but you guys owe me, okay?
[Jay glares at Andy. Again. He gets a lot of glares, this guy.]
ELI: We’re grateful, Andy.
[And now, Andy beams. Recognition, that’s all he wants. And attention. And, you know, everything a kid needs.]
ELI: Well it looks like everything’s progressing nicely. Soon we’ll begin hammering the nails into the coffin of New Alberta Pro Wrestling, and North America Pro Wrestling will prevail.
KENNY: Damn right.
ELI: Rex Caliber won’t know what’s hit him – and believe me, this REBEL fiasco is the last of his worries. The Untouchables are about to take 2007 by storm...
[Jay grins. Kenny grins. Eli grins. And Andy is still grinning, only somewhat inanely.]
ELI: To the Untouchables!
[Eli puts his hand in the middle. Jay adds his, and then Kenny follows suit with his massive paw. And Andy? He thought about it.]
ALL: THE UNTOUCHABLES!
[Eli and Kenny stand.]
JOB: I’m gonna prove myself to you guys! This Tuesday, I’m gonna show you what I’m made of. Our opponents? Wrong place, wrong time. Too bad.
[Out.]
[Kenny Krenshov is your tag team partner. But he’s six-nine.]
[Kenny Krenshov is your stablemate. But he’s three hundred and sixty eight pounds.]
[Kenny Krenshov is your friend, but he’s a giant former jailbird with a nasty temperament and a very short fuse.]
[You’re meeting Kenny Krenshov to talk shop, to discuss the future, but you are crapping your pants. I mean, this guy is verging on psychopathic. You just saw him run through seven other men in a battle royal, and the week before he tossed The Famous Monsters of Hollyweird about like rag dolls. Even you felt bad for them.]
[But as much as you felt bad for them, you were far more relieved you weren’t them. If anybody ever felt like asking Jay O’Brien to re-address the reasons he joined forces with Kenny Krenshov, Kurt Castle and Chris Casino in the first place, then all he’d have to do is relay to them what he saw Tuesday night, first hand, up close and personal. He saw a monster in the prime of his career tearing people apart with absolutely no regard for anything or anyone. Except Jay.]
[The sheer relief can be summed up in one single word: Damn… Sorry Ron Simmons, but it had to be said.]
“Come on, he can’t be that scary.”
[Andy. Jay gives him the kind of look that just says “What the HELL do you know”?]
JOB: Have you seen Kenny Krenshov in person?
AOB: No, but...
JOB: “The Colossal” Kenny Krenshov?
AOB: I’ve seen him on TV!
JOB: Did you shit your pants?
AOB: No...
JOB: Then believe me, it does not do the man justice.
[Andy shrugs. Hey, he’s a former wrestler himself, he’s seen big guys before. He’s wrestled big guys before, and damn it, he’s even beaten big guys before. He’s not convinced.]
AOB: I bet you I ain’t impressed.
[Jay just laughs.]
AOB: What!? You saying I’m gonna be scared of that big goof!? Just because he’s (in his most sarcastic voice) six-nine, three-sixty? You know who you’re talking to, Jay? I’m AWESOME ANDY.
JOB: You’re an (BLEEP).
AOB: Hey --- just remember who’s doing who the favour here.
JOB: Oh, don’t worry. I know where we stand, and I know what I owe you. Andy, I don’t owe you a thing.
AOB: Oh really? Because, you know, I could easily revoke my help with your application for US citizenship...
[Jay glares at Andy. And if looks could kill...]
AOB: Then again… But hey, hey, you want to represent North American Pro Wrestling? Dude, you gotta lose the Britishness.
JOB: I’m aware of that.
AOB: Yeah. Yeah, or you’d be facing Kenny Krenshov in a week’s time when the Untouchables kick you to the curb.
JOB: That won’t happen. Because you won’t revoke your help. Because the moment you do, Andy, you’re on the first flight back to England, bags packed, within five minutes. Okay?
AOB: Whatever.
[Andy shrugs.]
[And then, a knock on the door...]
[Andy sits up straight. Jay stands. He makes his way to the door, and opens it. Eli Potts.]
ELI: Jay! Great to see you!
JOB: Yeah, hey, Eli, what’s up. Whe, where’s Kenny?
ELI: He’s just grabbing a few things from the trunk of the car.
[Woah, woah... lost in translation.]
AOB: Trunk?
JOB: Boot, Andy.
AOB: Ahh... Damn yanks.
[Eli GLARES at Andy.]
ELI: What’s he doing here?
JOB: Honestly, sometimes I ask myself that question.
[Andy sneers.]
ELI: Ah, here’s Kenny now. Shall we?
[Jay steps aside as Eli Potts enters the room, followed by “The Colossal” Kenny Krenshov. And just like Jay promised, the mere sight of this monster is enough to take the wind out of Andy’s sails. Immediately, he jumps up and extends his hand. This is a man you want on your side!]
[Kenny just looks at Andy’s hand.]
KENNY: And you are?
AOB: Err, I, I’m Andy... “Awes---”... err... Andy O’Brien. Jay’s brother.
[Kenny laughs. Jay motions for him to take a seat. He obliges.]
JOB: So, Kenny... I need to say, I’m... sorry.
KENNY: Sorry?
JOB: About the battle royal... eliminated by a woman... I mean, Christ, I fared no better than Lex freakin’ Vain...
KENNY: We’ll avenge that.
[The room falls into an awkward silence. God good, this guy is threatening.]
ELI: Don’t worry about it, Jay, everybody gets caught wanting every now and then. What matters is the future – the future of the Untouchables.
[Jay nods.]
ELI: That’s why, this week, we need to win that eight man tag, whether those… ugh... Cowboys co operate with us or not.
JOB: Right, right. I promise, I won’t let you down again.
[Eli smiles. It’s almost warm. Almost.]
ELI: All is rosy in the Untouchables garden so long as we don’t let ourselves get complacent. NAPW is ours for the taking.
KENNY: I’ll even take care of those four myself if I have to.
JOB: That... that won’t be necessary. I’m here, I’m ready, and I’m willing. I’ll pull my weight from now on. And I got business to take care of with that Lyndsey Valentine bitch, too.
ELI: Good… Now then, down to business. Your application for US citizenship?
JOB: That’ll take a few weeks to clear, but it should be okay thanks to ---
AOB: ME! Hey, you can thank me later if you like, but you guys owe me, okay?
[Jay glares at Andy. Again. He gets a lot of glares, this guy.]
ELI: We’re grateful, Andy.
[And now, Andy beams. Recognition, that’s all he wants. And attention. And, you know, everything a kid needs.]
ELI: Well it looks like everything’s progressing nicely. Soon we’ll begin hammering the nails into the coffin of New Alberta Pro Wrestling, and North America Pro Wrestling will prevail.
KENNY: Damn right.
ELI: Rex Caliber won’t know what’s hit him – and believe me, this REBEL fiasco is the last of his worries. The Untouchables are about to take 2007 by storm...
[Jay grins. Kenny grins. Eli grins. And Andy is still grinning, only somewhat inanely.]
ELI: To the Untouchables!
[Eli puts his hand in the middle. Jay adds his, and then Kenny follows suit with his massive paw. And Andy? He thought about it.]
ALL: THE UNTOUCHABLES!
[Eli and Kenny stand.]
JOB: I’m gonna prove myself to you guys! This Tuesday, I’m gonna show you what I’m made of. Our opponents? Wrong place, wrong time. Too bad.
[Out.]