Post by Dio Muerte on Mar 4, 2007 23:51:54 GMT -5
The scene opens into Jeff James driving the infamous used 02 Tahoe, Dio sitting in the passenger side. Both men have a conference as the destination.
Jeff James So howja get rid of the traffic?
Dio Muerte I gave them all I had. Sent them running and decongested the jam.
Jeff James Straight, so what's the plan for the conference?
Dio Muerte We don't need one.
Jeff James We always gotta have a plan, puts you in the proper mind set.
Dio Muerte Well sometimes the best mind set is no mind set. Just go in with a clear mind no thoughts. It works best.
Jeff James You honestly can't believe that.
Dio Muerte I do, with no thoughts, no stress, no worries, no wrinkles.
Jeff James Easy for someone behind a mask to say.
Dio Muerte Ha, but, seriously, when you go into a situation in deep stress, it makes everything feel heavier and harder to complete.
Jeff James But, game plan, it's best to strategize.
Dio Muerte Yes you do have a good point, but, you stress, not strategize. Dude, you've been a wreck for the past couple of weeks. Your head hasn't been in the right place as of late.
Jeff James Yeah, I know. I see myself falling, but, I can't stop. I'm full aware of what is going on, I just have no control.
The weird part is, I continue setting up goals, thinking I can accomplish them. When I set it up, I know I can, then later on, it's like, (BLEEP) did I get myself into.
Dio Muerte I've been there, I know where you're coming from. It's like a battle between your will power and your sub conscience.
Jeff Muerte Exactly, I know for a fact I'm able to beat anyone in that NAPW locker room. And I've faced some pretty though wrestlers, we've both went to the limit and now I just can't do it.
Dio Muerte A gradual downward spiral and you have front row seats.
Jeff James But, what do I do?
Dio Muerte Pull over, let me drive.
Jeff James You don't have a license.
Dio Muerte You think that stops me?
Jeff James What if we get pulled over?
Dio Muerte There is no what if's. I'm a great driver, trust me.
Jeff reluctantly pulls over. Both men hop out the SUV switching seats. Dio Muerte makes into the car before Jeff and drives off. Jeff runs rapidly after the Tahoe, jumping on the back of the car and crawling through the sun roof.
Jeff James The hell was that for.
Dio Muerte See, that wasn't so hard. Did you think about it? Or, just did?
Jeff James I just did.
Dio Muerte See, Jeffery, things should come to you as instincts not thoughts.
Jeff James Can I get a hold of the wheel?
Dio Muerte Nah, I'm not done yet.
Dio Muerte switches to the other side of the road and begins driving straight. Serving and nearly dodging destruction.
Jeff James PULL OVER NOW. PLEASE. PULL THE HELL OVER. YOU'RE GONNA (BLEEP)ING CRASH.
SHIIIIIIT
Dio Muerte avoids colliding into a gas tanker.
Jeff James THAT WAS (BLEEP)ING CLOSE.
PULL THE (BLEEP) OVER NOW.
WE'RE GONNA (BLEEP)ING DIE MAN!
Dio Muerte looks over to Jeff James who's a scared wreck in the second row of the SUV.
Dio Muerte LOOK SHUT THE (BLEEP) UP NOW!
Jeff James LOOK AT WHAT YOU'RE DOING! WE CAN GET CRUSHED!
Dio Muerte stops the damn car. Right there, right in the middle of it all.
Dio Muerte Get out the car. You're driving.
Jeff James The (BLEEP) I am.
Dio Muerte Mother (BLEEP)er, do it now. Or I crash this vehicle.
Jeff James No, you won't.
Dio Muerte Are you sure?
Revs up the engine
Jeff James OKAY FINE!
Jeff James, opens the door. On coming traffic takes the door clean off.
Jeff James THAT COULD HAD BEEN ME
Dio Muerte SHUT THE (BLEEP) UP AND DO IT.
Jeff James gets out of the car in a blind rush and makes it to driver side.
But Dio Muerte locks the door.
Jeff James (BLEEP) ARE YOU DOING!?
Dio Muerte unlocks the door. Moving to the back, letting Jeff in.
Dio Muerte Drive, (BLEEP)er, drive.
Jeff James THEY GON KILL ME!
Dio Muerte DO! Don't think, just do.
Jeff James drives, serving car after car. He then meets a tanker.
He luckily gets the (BLEEP) out of the way in a nick of time.
The tanker not so lucky. It flips over, sliding on the highway, then more cars with panic drivers serve piling up.
Jeff James ITS GONNA BLOW MAN.
BOOOOOOM!
Dio Muerte opens the back window and switches the license plate.
Dio Muerte Get back on the right side of the road (BLEEP)er.
Jeff James Whatever you say man.
Moments later, they make it to the conference in one piece.
Dio Muerte You good?
Jeff James Yeah, but, I need some new pants.
Dio Muerte It's nothing. Just go in there and follow my lead, K?
Jeff James Yeah.
They walk inside the conference room. The first thing Dio Muerte does is flip off the first person he sees, kicks over a podium, exposing two bats. Tosses a bat to Jeff James.
Dio Muerte You know what to do.
Dio Muerte and Jeff James start an orgy of wreckage in the conference room. People begin to scream for their lives, because this maybe their last moments on earth. But, ironically, Jeff and Dio Muerte just damage inanimate objects.
The aftermath resembles an indoor twister fused with an indoor tsunami fused with an indoor hurricane and fused that bad boy with a Spirit Bomb and an Ultimate KAH MAY HA MAY HA! Yeah, I had to put that in there.
Jeff James and Dio Muerte are back in the used 02 Tahoe heading back home
Dio Muerte So, son, you good? You ready for tomorrow? No type of problems?
Jeff James Word up.
Fades out into a news report about a fifteen car collision
Jeff James So howja get rid of the traffic?
Dio Muerte I gave them all I had. Sent them running and decongested the jam.
Jeff James Straight, so what's the plan for the conference?
Dio Muerte We don't need one.
Jeff James We always gotta have a plan, puts you in the proper mind set.
Dio Muerte Well sometimes the best mind set is no mind set. Just go in with a clear mind no thoughts. It works best.
Jeff James You honestly can't believe that.
Dio Muerte I do, with no thoughts, no stress, no worries, no wrinkles.
Jeff James Easy for someone behind a mask to say.
Dio Muerte Ha, but, seriously, when you go into a situation in deep stress, it makes everything feel heavier and harder to complete.
Jeff James But, game plan, it's best to strategize.
Dio Muerte Yes you do have a good point, but, you stress, not strategize. Dude, you've been a wreck for the past couple of weeks. Your head hasn't been in the right place as of late.
Jeff James Yeah, I know. I see myself falling, but, I can't stop. I'm full aware of what is going on, I just have no control.
The weird part is, I continue setting up goals, thinking I can accomplish them. When I set it up, I know I can, then later on, it's like, (BLEEP) did I get myself into.
Dio Muerte I've been there, I know where you're coming from. It's like a battle between your will power and your sub conscience.
Jeff Muerte Exactly, I know for a fact I'm able to beat anyone in that NAPW locker room. And I've faced some pretty though wrestlers, we've both went to the limit and now I just can't do it.
Dio Muerte A gradual downward spiral and you have front row seats.
Jeff James But, what do I do?
Dio Muerte Pull over, let me drive.
Jeff James You don't have a license.
Dio Muerte You think that stops me?
Jeff James What if we get pulled over?
Dio Muerte There is no what if's. I'm a great driver, trust me.
Jeff reluctantly pulls over. Both men hop out the SUV switching seats. Dio Muerte makes into the car before Jeff and drives off. Jeff runs rapidly after the Tahoe, jumping on the back of the car and crawling through the sun roof.
Jeff James The hell was that for.
Dio Muerte See, that wasn't so hard. Did you think about it? Or, just did?
Jeff James I just did.
Dio Muerte See, Jeffery, things should come to you as instincts not thoughts.
Jeff James Can I get a hold of the wheel?
Dio Muerte Nah, I'm not done yet.
Dio Muerte switches to the other side of the road and begins driving straight. Serving and nearly dodging destruction.
Jeff James PULL OVER NOW. PLEASE. PULL THE HELL OVER. YOU'RE GONNA (BLEEP)ING CRASH.
SHIIIIIIT
Dio Muerte avoids colliding into a gas tanker.
Jeff James THAT WAS (BLEEP)ING CLOSE.
PULL THE (BLEEP) OVER NOW.
WE'RE GONNA (BLEEP)ING DIE MAN!
Dio Muerte looks over to Jeff James who's a scared wreck in the second row of the SUV.
Dio Muerte LOOK SHUT THE (BLEEP) UP NOW!
Jeff James LOOK AT WHAT YOU'RE DOING! WE CAN GET CRUSHED!
Dio Muerte stops the damn car. Right there, right in the middle of it all.
Dio Muerte Get out the car. You're driving.
Jeff James The (BLEEP) I am.
Dio Muerte Mother (BLEEP)er, do it now. Or I crash this vehicle.
Jeff James No, you won't.
Dio Muerte Are you sure?
Revs up the engine
Jeff James OKAY FINE!
Jeff James, opens the door. On coming traffic takes the door clean off.
Jeff James THAT COULD HAD BEEN ME
Dio Muerte SHUT THE (BLEEP) UP AND DO IT.
Jeff James gets out of the car in a blind rush and makes it to driver side.
But Dio Muerte locks the door.
Jeff James (BLEEP) ARE YOU DOING!?
Dio Muerte unlocks the door. Moving to the back, letting Jeff in.
Dio Muerte Drive, (BLEEP)er, drive.
Jeff James THEY GON KILL ME!
Dio Muerte DO! Don't think, just do.
Jeff James drives, serving car after car. He then meets a tanker.
He luckily gets the (BLEEP) out of the way in a nick of time.
The tanker not so lucky. It flips over, sliding on the highway, then more cars with panic drivers serve piling up.
Jeff James ITS GONNA BLOW MAN.
BOOOOOOM!
Dio Muerte opens the back window and switches the license plate.
Dio Muerte Get back on the right side of the road (BLEEP)er.
Jeff James Whatever you say man.
Moments later, they make it to the conference in one piece.
Dio Muerte You good?
Jeff James Yeah, but, I need some new pants.
Dio Muerte It's nothing. Just go in there and follow my lead, K?
Jeff James Yeah.
They walk inside the conference room. The first thing Dio Muerte does is flip off the first person he sees, kicks over a podium, exposing two bats. Tosses a bat to Jeff James.
Dio Muerte You know what to do.
Dio Muerte and Jeff James start an orgy of wreckage in the conference room. People begin to scream for their lives, because this maybe their last moments on earth. But, ironically, Jeff and Dio Muerte just damage inanimate objects.
The aftermath resembles an indoor twister fused with an indoor tsunami fused with an indoor hurricane and fused that bad boy with a Spirit Bomb and an Ultimate KAH MAY HA MAY HA! Yeah, I had to put that in there.
Jeff James and Dio Muerte are back in the used 02 Tahoe heading back home
Dio Muerte So, son, you good? You ready for tomorrow? No type of problems?
Jeff James Word up.
Fades out into a news report about a fifteen car collision