Snakes

["Sick" Billy Kryenik]

[The lights were dark and dim. The smell was of hops, barley and sin. The crowd was rowdy and loving. Conversation flowed like change, Filling up each others tip cups. The oxygen was thick with hot air. The people moved back and forth; like slithering snakes in the grass. Elegant and wild. In the spotlight were woman of all shapes and sizes. Women of all ages, premature and legal. There is no care for age here, only the desire to snag money like taxman jingling his death bell along the roads leading to Nottingham.

Blues, Greens, Reds and Purples spin out of control and splash like paint along the bodies of the sinful dames and the eager lads. Distinctive, he walks through the sea of humanity, trying to quench his thirst. People move like molasses, sticking to him not letting go of their place to stand; set in stone. He slinks, he deaks, he tries to make light of the situation, but no one knows him here. He doesn’t get special treatment at a place like this.

Not until, however a mid twenties animal named Security notices his struggle through the crowd. Security leans over into the ear of the girl passing out drinks like a line up for gruel.

“That’s Billy Kryenik.”

“Who?” She replies, unknowing and ignorant by her own hand. She doesn’t have a care for who Billy Kryenik is. The only thing she knows is that her tip jar is low, much like the crowd beyond her.

“I’ll be back.”, Security yells as he makes his burly presence known in the pit of people. They move quickly for him, he is of course ; The Gatekeeper of the night. It’s by his hand that the people are judged. He chooses whether their night lives… or dies.

Billy is still struggling to get to the bar. He just wants to wet his whistle and get out from the cold for a little while. All he wants is for a taste of rejuvenation to sooth his worn soul. His physical pain is not beaten down by pain pills, but golden liquids that his partner Tommy Deathrow swears by. 100% natural remedy, no preservatives, sub-zero served.

“Mr. Kryenik!” Security yells.

Billy hears it, not expecting to be pointed out with this crowd.

“Billy!” screams Security.

People turn their heads as Billy looks around the bar to figure out who’s yelling his name. He see’s Security, walking quickly towards him. Security waves and gives a slight smirk as he analyzes Billy’s struggle through the paste. But the people move, Security is the solution to break up the glue.

“Need a little help?” Security asks politely.

“Yeah Man, I cant seem to get through this (BLEEP)ing crowd of people. It’s pretty thick in here tonight. A little too thick.” Billy says with reply.

“Ok man, follow me.” Security opens a pathway with his arm, as Billy takes lead. The people begin to break up and Billy’s comfort level rises two points. They get to the bar and Billy extends two of his fingers, asking for two pints of Sub-Zero Canadian. The barkeep nods and goes to work.

Security leans into the bar, wanting conversation. Billy is more than willing to compliment him. He’s greatful. He can finally get that drink, and a little room to heat up from the ungodly winter which drapes Alberta like a blanket of permafrost.]

Billy: Thanks man, I really appreciate it.

Security: No problem. I’m actually pretty surprised to see you in this place. This place isn’t know for anything other than sexual tension.

Billy: Yeah it’s not really my kind of place, but I needed to get out of that cold. You could neuter a brass donkey out there.

Security: Yeah, it’s (BLEEP)ing bullshit. Sometimes I wonder why I stay in Canada. I should be down in Nevada or California where its warm and the women are just as hot.

Billy: Ha Ha, yeah it’d be nice wouldn’t it?

Security: Sure would man. My names Greg.

[Greg extends his hand outward, with Billy grabbing it almost instantly, shaking it firmly and friendly.]

Billy: Nice to meet you.

Greg: You too man. I’m a big fan. You and Tommy Deathrow, you guys are (BLEEP)ing insane!

Billy: Heh. Well I don’t know if we’re insane… but that’s what some circles seem to think of us.

Greg: Like that last match with the Untouchables? How the hell are you able to walk?

Billy: It’s funny actually, we’re both still pretty banged up from that one. I’m not sure how we came out of it alive, but Tommy hit the big move and I got the pinfall. Thank god for that.

Greg: You beat Casino again! Krenshov again too!

Billy: Yeah, I’m two up on his right now. Same with Krenshov. But it wasn’t all me, Tommy kicked some serious ass and was jotting down names in the process. I’m pretty glad he’s on my team and not against me.

Greg: Well, you two have faught before and that was a pretty (BLEEP)ed up match. Taipei? I mean who in their right mind wants to face someone with glass glued onto their fists?

Billy: Ha Ha, you’d be surprised how far we would go to settle a score. He’s been my best friend for eight years now. Up and down the road, left and right on the highway. He’s been there. When you know each other that well, the only way to settle a score is to go into unknown territory. Neither of us had had a match like that before. It’s kind of brutal to think about. Him and I have been in so many gimmick matches that anytime we have a beef, we have to up the anty. I’m horrified to think of what would happen if him and I disagreed again.

Greg: You guys on the outs now?

Billy: Oh (BLEEP) no. We’re going strong man. The Doomriders are making no excuses this year. We’re back together and we’re showing all those non-believers what we should have been doing last year. I’m just saying that Tommy Deathrow is a (BLEEP)ing animal. I don’t think the luck gods would be with me if we ever had to go at it again. He’s been on fire lately.

Greg: Well you both need to be on the same page. With the Untouchables anyway… their a pretty impressive team. Casino with the lead, and then Krenshov and Castle as his goons… and now? Ravager! That is a team where you know their going to dominate.

Billy: Tell me about it. The gods certainly aren’t doing us any favours. Four on two… Well Four on Three if you count Evan as our partner…

Greg: Cartwright?

Billy: Yeah, Evan Cartwright.

[The bartender pops up two ice cold cups of liquid gold. Billy grabs the first and opens his throat to let the precious flow down his throat into his satisfied stomach. He wipes his mouth clean as Greg the Security Guard .]

Billy: I don’t even know if he’s showing up for this fight. I haven’t talked to him, and I know Tommy hasn’t.

Greg: Man, you should get on that. You guys are going to have to be on the same page.

Billy: Yeah, I know eh. But Evans been mysterious lately. He’s been a ghost in the window. He’s been looking in through but hasn’t bothered to smash through. I don’t know what his deal is. All I know is that Tommy is my only reliable partner and going into this Tuesday, he’s the only guy I need by my side anyway. I know full well going into this next match that it probably won’t go well for the Doomriders…

Greg: Pfft (BLEEP) that. You have all of Alberta behind you two.

Billy: Hah, thanks man I appreciate that. But just check this out for a second. At Cold Snap we took Casino and Krenshov to their limit and beat them in the ring. Casino can make excuses that its because he isn’t a “hardcore” wrestler, but how easily he forgets that I beat him cleanly a year ago. There was no false finish, it was a roll up and the victory. This time he took the match. He chose to sign the contract to come into the realm of terror and we called him on it. Funny how a man who runs the Gaming community in Vegas, was caught bluffing.

But anyway, here’s what I figure. Since Evan is MIA, and we beat the Untouchables at Cold Snap… there’s bound to be a few surprises. Casino isn’t (BLEEP)ing stupid and he sure as hell doesn’t accept defeat with a grain of salt. I KNOW he has something brutal planned for us. Him and his group of misfit Americans who can’t stop bitching.

Greg: What do you think their gonna do? Attack you before the match?

Billy: I don’t know…

[Billy slams the other pint down and follows it up with a small burp and a closed fist to his chest for good measure. He shakes his head and sighs with satisfaction.]

Billy: But probably not. The Untouchables are snakes, but they have a bit of honour. If they just beat us up before the match, it won’t get them anywhere. We would have still have held a win over them cleanly. Maybe it was in a match on our terms, but it was still clean. There was no prematch bullshit, just four guys fighting it out. Now that they have their opportunity to to get revenge in a situation that theiur more confident in… With three of the four of them involved, they’ll try to come at us in the match and beat us there. We’re like the tickle on their dingleberrie. They’ll wanna cough us out and spit us on the ground.

[Suddently to the left of them, one of the snakes decides to show his fangs and poisons another cobra with his fang fists of fury. Greg snaps his glare from Billy to the ensuing brawl and like second nature; plays snake handler, grabbing their slippery the slipper scales and holding them firmly by the throat.]

Greg: Yelling back to Billy Nice meetin’ ya man.

Billy: Good luck tough guy. Hope you get to Nevada someday. Maybe you can hit Casino where it really hurts; his pocket book.

[Billy takes in a deep breath and steps quickly towards the animal kingdom, sauntering through the crowd, but holding in the pain of his ribcage as people bump into him. It was nice to not be noticed. But the cold waits for him, as it will notice him as soon as he walks out the door. It’ll swamp him like a mob of fans.

“Holy (BLEEP). I’ll never get used to this shit. Anything under negative zero and I’m (BLEEP)ed…” Billy says to himself as he steps out in the blue cold.

He puts his hands into his pocket before the blue can strike his hands it dye it the same. He starts to walk down the street, with his head held high. The beer was like an old friend. He’s a little warmer, and a little more easy going with his physical pain. He feels a little more one hundred percent.]

Billy: It’s coming soon fella’s. Another war with one another. Another chance for one team to get their lights punched out and left out permanently. Darkness can over take any one of us as we hear the refs pounding hand echo through our blank minds. This time, it’s a bit bigger. The stake is a little harder to get at. This time, we have two champions and a monster looking at us like a pack of brutal Cyclopes’ waiting to cannibalize their prey.

But that’s ok. I got no problem with that. Tommy Deathrow has no problem with that. Evan Cartwright… if he chooses to take this shit seriously, will bite back just as hard as those glutonous goons. There is no fear here.

All there is in embrace of what can happen. There’s no regret if something bad happens, all I want to do is have the Doomriders stomp the brains out of your skulls one more time. All I want is for you to bring your violence so I can chew it up and spit it back in your face. I want the nails of pain to be hammered into your skulls so that you finally realize that The Untouchable juggernaut can, has and will be stopped permanently.

[Billy sniffles up some mucus that drips from his nose. (BLEEP)ing cold makes you feel like like you’re getting sick.]

Billy: All I can say is that I have both a verbal and physical message for all of them. Kurt Castle, you’re still the Provincial Champ, but we both know if it was you and I for that belt – I’d kick your ass again and take that prize from you. There’s no stopping it. You can’t hide behind the “off day” excuse twice. This will be the nail in your coffin and another example of how the Untouchables are full of bullshit. You aren’t the King of your Castle, ypu’re the (BLEEP)ing joker. The weakest link of that team and I will expose you. Don’t forget that I’ve been in the ring with all three of you. I won’t let you forget that. I’ll beat it back into you just in case you forgot. Then you’ll the feel the wrath of Tommy Deathrow, and former heavyweight Champion Evan Cartwright and you’ll be running back to the States with your tail between your legs.

Billy: Kenny Krenshov, I know what you can do. You wanted to put me out by tossing me off that ledge. I know you got a killer instinct that is almost unbeatable. But you know what Kenny? You know how you beat a killer? You become one and kill before they kill you. That’s what I did Kenny, you remember Cold Snap? I dragged you down to hell with me and (BLEEP)ed you up just as badly as you wrecked me. I’m not going to stop there Krenshov. I know your hungry for revenge, but you won’t get your full course, you’ll just get table scraps that will choke your throat and asphyxiate you. I’m going for three and o against you Krenshov. Let’s see how big of a monster you really are.

Billy: Lastly, Chris Casino… It’s you and I again. Once more you get the opportunity to take me, the thorn in your side out and toss me onto the ground to decay. One more chance to prove that all those times I or the Doomriders have beaten you were just flukes.

You seem to like to think that you have more wrestling ability then me. And that was true once. You were the far better wrestler… Once. But things change Chris. Maybe you haven’t noticed but I’ve built a bit of momentum since I came back. Not on my ability to take pain and smack bitches around with chairs… but because of my skill. I have a little move called the Halo that I’m so close to perfecting… Maybe I’ll perfect it on you? Maybe I’ll snap your spine so you’ll always remember that Billy Kryenik isn’t everything he used to be. He’s a whole new machine. Rebuilt with a new design but the same old soul that belts out like a baritone saxophone.

And now Chris, with the Doomriders back together… With the Doomriders, proving that they belong at the top of this company once again, it’sl only a matter of time before we stamp you out. It’s only a matter of time before you push so much, and you try so hard that you’ll burn yourself out trying to seek vengeance… and then the Doomriders will pick you apart and expose your raw.

The Untouchables may be your last hurrah.

[Billy passes the camera, as it records him leaving the scene. He was beaten, he was bloody but him and Tommy Deathrow were victorious none the less. Now, going into another war with the same brutal opponents, plus one. The Doomriders and Evan Carwright have a big task on their hands. They must defend NAPW once again… And keep defending it until the Untouchable virus is stopped.]