Post by Bruce "The Beast" Richards on Jan 23, 2007 16:10:03 GMT -5
(Bruce "The Beast" Richards and Stylin' Kyle Roberts are relaxing on the patio chairs on Bruce's balcony. Being that it's JANUARY, the two men are in winter boots, coats, and gloves, but they're hanging out on the patio drinking beer and enjoying the sunshine.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: (Taking a drink of beer.) Afternoon, folks. I know it might seem a little strange to see Kyle and I out here on the patio drinking beer. After all, it's only three degreees outside. But then again, Kyle and I aren't what you'd call "conventional".
KYLE ROBERTS: Plus, the beer stays cold the whole time!
BRUCE RICHARDS: You might think that it's ridiculous, sure. But we just had a crazy six-show string of victories in the NAPW, and if we don't deserve a bit of a break after all of that, then I don't know what we'd deserve a break for.
KYLE ROBERTS: How about for beating the Midnight Cowboys again two weeks from now AND climbing the big hill in that Tag Team Invitational! We'll deserve a break then!
BRUCE RICHARDS: Getting ahead of ourselves, Kyle.
KYLE ROBERTS: Ah, who are we kidding, Bruce? We'll take it: you know it, I know it, even Joey Malone knows it. That's why he's so down in the dumps. Well, that and the return of Mr. Caliber-er, Mr. Canada. Now that we're not defending our titles every week, we've had some time to examine the whole situation.
BRUCE RICHARDS: True, it's been nice to get a little perspective, but don't you think the past week has seemed...I don't know Kyle, what word would you use to describe it?
KYLE ROBERTS: Boring?
BRUCE RICHARDS: I was going to suggest leisurely, but boring works too.
KYLE ROBERTS: See, Joey, you thought that making us run the gauntlet would tire us out and we'd be easy pickings. But it only kept us on top of our game. And then you got pouty, threw the Celtic Assassins out, and when your new golden boys Clint & Stone couldn't get the job done, you figure, what, you give us a few weeks off and we'll soften up? Your first amazing plan doesn't work so you do Plan B, which is the OPPOSITE? (Tapping his head.) Joey, Joey, Joey. It's not going to work like that.
BRUCE RICHARDS: After all, Joey, WE'RE the Tag Champions. We have a little say in when these things are defended. Sure, we can't go against your insane stipulations. But we're not going to sit idly by for two weeks.
KYLE ROBERTS: Sit idly by? I have a match tonight, Bruce!
BRUCE RICHARDS: True, true. But it's a singles match against the lesser of two Zellors. (Holds up the belts in both his hands.) Don't you want to hold the belt over your head and hear the words "AND STILL TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS" again before Cold Snap?
KYLE ROBERTS: (Staring hungrily at his belt.) Do I!
BRUCE RICHARDS: That's what I thought. Joey, you said there was no other team that you wanted to take the belts from us. Which makes sense; I mean, there are some pretty terrible teams in the NAPW. If by some miracle the Next Generation won the belts from us, that'd be like going from filet mignon to minute steak. So, here's what Kyle and I are going to do. We're making an OPEN challenge. Any team want to get our belts? Just try it.
KYLE ROBERTS: But wait! There's more! Joey Malone doesn't want anyone in the NAPW getting their mitts on these! How on Earth will we be able to defend the titles?
BRUCE RICHARDS: (Smiles.) Looks like we have to think outside the box. The challenge is only open to non NAPW tag teams.
KYLE ROBERTS: Ooooh, I like it! It's unconventional!
BRUCE RICHARDS: (Shrugs.) What can I say? We're ahead of our time.
KYLE ROBERTS: Joey, you'd better sit by the phone. I'm sure you'll be flooded with calls in the next few hours, from sports columnists, news programs, and oh yes, plenty of tag teams. There are literally dozens of teams who would like the opportunity to go up against the number one tag team in wrestling today.
BRUCE RICHARDS: With all those teams hungry for a chance to prove their mettle, who knows who will pop up?
KYLE ROBERTS: (Holds up his bottle of beer.) To genius, Bruce.
BRUCE RICHARDS: (Clink.) To genius.
TIFFANY: (From inside the house.) Okay, I got the new hat and...what are you two doing out there? (Stands by the patio door.) It's JANUARY! What are you, idiots?
KYLE ROBERTS: Unconventional, Tiffany. I believe the word you're looking for is UNCONVENTIONAL.
(Tiffany huffs and walks back into the apartment. Fade out on Bruce & Kyle enjoying their beers.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: (Taking a drink of beer.) Afternoon, folks. I know it might seem a little strange to see Kyle and I out here on the patio drinking beer. After all, it's only three degreees outside. But then again, Kyle and I aren't what you'd call "conventional".
KYLE ROBERTS: Plus, the beer stays cold the whole time!
BRUCE RICHARDS: You might think that it's ridiculous, sure. But we just had a crazy six-show string of victories in the NAPW, and if we don't deserve a bit of a break after all of that, then I don't know what we'd deserve a break for.
KYLE ROBERTS: How about for beating the Midnight Cowboys again two weeks from now AND climbing the big hill in that Tag Team Invitational! We'll deserve a break then!
BRUCE RICHARDS: Getting ahead of ourselves, Kyle.
KYLE ROBERTS: Ah, who are we kidding, Bruce? We'll take it: you know it, I know it, even Joey Malone knows it. That's why he's so down in the dumps. Well, that and the return of Mr. Caliber-er, Mr. Canada. Now that we're not defending our titles every week, we've had some time to examine the whole situation.
BRUCE RICHARDS: True, it's been nice to get a little perspective, but don't you think the past week has seemed...I don't know Kyle, what word would you use to describe it?
KYLE ROBERTS: Boring?
BRUCE RICHARDS: I was going to suggest leisurely, but boring works too.
KYLE ROBERTS: See, Joey, you thought that making us run the gauntlet would tire us out and we'd be easy pickings. But it only kept us on top of our game. And then you got pouty, threw the Celtic Assassins out, and when your new golden boys Clint & Stone couldn't get the job done, you figure, what, you give us a few weeks off and we'll soften up? Your first amazing plan doesn't work so you do Plan B, which is the OPPOSITE? (Tapping his head.) Joey, Joey, Joey. It's not going to work like that.
BRUCE RICHARDS: After all, Joey, WE'RE the Tag Champions. We have a little say in when these things are defended. Sure, we can't go against your insane stipulations. But we're not going to sit idly by for two weeks.
KYLE ROBERTS: Sit idly by? I have a match tonight, Bruce!
BRUCE RICHARDS: True, true. But it's a singles match against the lesser of two Zellors. (Holds up the belts in both his hands.) Don't you want to hold the belt over your head and hear the words "AND STILL TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS" again before Cold Snap?
KYLE ROBERTS: (Staring hungrily at his belt.) Do I!
BRUCE RICHARDS: That's what I thought. Joey, you said there was no other team that you wanted to take the belts from us. Which makes sense; I mean, there are some pretty terrible teams in the NAPW. If by some miracle the Next Generation won the belts from us, that'd be like going from filet mignon to minute steak. So, here's what Kyle and I are going to do. We're making an OPEN challenge. Any team want to get our belts? Just try it.
KYLE ROBERTS: But wait! There's more! Joey Malone doesn't want anyone in the NAPW getting their mitts on these! How on Earth will we be able to defend the titles?
BRUCE RICHARDS: (Smiles.) Looks like we have to think outside the box. The challenge is only open to non NAPW tag teams.
KYLE ROBERTS: Ooooh, I like it! It's unconventional!
BRUCE RICHARDS: (Shrugs.) What can I say? We're ahead of our time.
KYLE ROBERTS: Joey, you'd better sit by the phone. I'm sure you'll be flooded with calls in the next few hours, from sports columnists, news programs, and oh yes, plenty of tag teams. There are literally dozens of teams who would like the opportunity to go up against the number one tag team in wrestling today.
BRUCE RICHARDS: With all those teams hungry for a chance to prove their mettle, who knows who will pop up?
KYLE ROBERTS: (Holds up his bottle of beer.) To genius, Bruce.
BRUCE RICHARDS: (Clink.) To genius.
TIFFANY: (From inside the house.) Okay, I got the new hat and...what are you two doing out there? (Stands by the patio door.) It's JANUARY! What are you, idiots?
KYLE ROBERTS: Unconventional, Tiffany. I believe the word you're looking for is UNCONVENTIONAL.
(Tiffany huffs and walks back into the apartment. Fade out on Bruce & Kyle enjoying their beers.)