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Post by Ryan Ro [NAPW] on Feb 26, 2007 20:19:48 GMT -5
Hello peeps, yes I know it late. But I was facing my arch nemesis. No not Frank Warburton, or Rex Caliber's alligator skin shoes, or even Brian Bruno's lack of you-know-what. None of that, my lower friends, could have amounted my hate towards my true enemy: writer's block. That's right, every columnists worst nightmare. I can only hope I can get though that horrid period of my life. So here it is, The Vain View. In all its wonderfully late glory.
TNF
Team Kurtis vs. Maxx Extreme & Marcus Chamberlain
Coming off their big win at Cold Snap, even though they didn't do anything in this match, Team Kurtis once again comes out on top against the odd teaming of Marcus Chamberlain and Maxx Extreme. And may I just say that Marcus looked in great form against the brotherly duo of Team Kurtis. I look forward for Marc to take on outside scoundrel Adam Benjamin very, very soon.
Triple Threat
Jeff James vs. Jay O'Brien vs. Johnny Rotten
Ex-longest TV Champ seams to have had a change of faith, and loses to young punk upstart Johnny Rotten because of it. Not to mention the smart/despicable moves of Jeff Fox. And who gets hung up in the cross-fires? Why its the talented Jay O'Brien. If it were up to me, Jay would be NAPW champ by now. His talents are purely showing, it just goes to show that the fans know nothing about anything.
And how do you follow a unfortunate loss for Jay O'Brien? Oh, i don't know. Maybe make Stylin' Kyle a wreck on TV and humiliate Sir Winchell by making him wear an ugly old singlet and get ravaged by...well, Ravager. God, moving on.
Next Generation vs. Monsters of Hollyweird
Wow, this match was horrid. A parody of everything that Hollywood, entertainment and wrestling stand for. It is no surprise that I cannot stand the two small sprites of The Next Generation, but I think the Monsters have earned the title of wrestlers that I hate the most. And, furthermore, it should be known that any-one who does not think that these two monsters are The Celtic Assassins in disguise, should be in the remedial class. Not to mention that their movement and ability is limited. What's next, a Ketchup Casket Match??...wait
David Banks vs Kevin Kodiak
Just when I think things are not going my way, I am graced with the presence of The Chairman of NAPW, David Banks. Yes my friends, the greatest man to ever grace a NAPW ring, David Banks, was in action against the bear-like Kevin Kodiak. Unfortunately, Legion's interference went the wrong way and ended up costing Bank, what could have been a very dominant victory. It seems now that the former team of Kodiak and Legion are once again darkest of enemies.
Bruce Richards vs. Stone Zellor
Yes, this was like the coveted match between Clint and Stylin' Kyle. But much better, why you ask? Not because of the skillz of Stone (even though he has a lot of skillz). No, because of what happened after the match. Kyle Roberts...KILLED D-X! Oh what a day! I don't know how to express in words the amount of excitement I am retaining. So to you, Mr. Roberts, I say, "Thank You."
Simply Beautiful vs. Lloyd Rees
Yes, the feud that I thought was going to boil over and end at Cold Snap. Nope, that only seamed to fuel the hate between these men. And this time it was one on one. Today it was number one contender and future champion Lloyd Rees against a cocky punk who some-how keeps going up the ranking boards. Amazingly this was very back and forth, I swore Lloyd was going to take it in the first three seconds. Any-who, after some awesome and smart moves Lloyd's action accidentally gets smashed right back in his face. And then, if getting kick in the face with only a chair to cushion the blow was bad enough, Simply wins the match?! What?! That was more surprising than Kyle turning on Bruce!
The Untouchables vs. The DOOMRIDERS & Evan Cartwright
Well at first, I thought why was Evan teaming with Doomriders? It was sad to see Evan work on the side of good. But that almost instantly changed when he teamed with Chris Casino. Then again, the Untouchable leader was not to be trusted. And on impact, Evan Cartwright had his ankle sickly snapped by a sick flying elbow when it was sandwiched between a chair. After The Riders & Cartwright were taken care of, they decided to announce their new member. Ravager? Nope, just as quickly as it was revealed, it was announced to be mere rumors and the real fourth member was revealed. The man who can only be known by one name; Jay O'Brien...
Yes my dearies, Four Untouchables, a couple shock win and this show was in the bag. The real question is what will happen during the O'Brien/Castle match. Will this paradise be lost before its even begun, or will some-one's eye accidentally be jabbed so they can fall down and be pinned for three whole seconds? Only time and maybe an oracle or two can be sure...
Action!
Dez Carter vs. Newfy Jack
We started off with longtime wrestler for NAPW, Dez Carter against the relative unknown and new addition to our roster Newfy Jack. Though he may be new to NAPW, his moves are like a veterans and his unique arsenal that includes cod kissing, may be the shine that gets Jack noticed by the higher ups.
Dio Muerte vs. Sam Finn
After his amazing Cold Snap debut, Sam Finn looked out of his element against Dio in this one. Maybe it's because he feels that he's better than this or maybe he couldn't handle Dio's enigmatic and hard hitting offense. Don't look for too much out of Sam if he continues like this.
Thomas Young vs. Krusty Kid Paul
Another very short match for Action!, which leads me to believe that either all the cream is going to rise to the top or the backstage moral after Joseph's departure is down. Every-one knows that Joseph was a staple in setting up Action to be a dominant, yet less popular show compared to TNF where many could watch interesting spectacles including early Pure Honor Match's, The Television Title and impressive wrestlers on their rise including Lobo, Lloyd Rees, Rex Caliber, and numerous more wrestlers. Back to the match, Thomas took an impressive win against Krusty Kid Paul.
Prince Darko vs. Nightmare
At first I wasn't sure who to root for, but I soon saw the fire in Nightmare's eyes that was once missing a few weeks back. Now he is on an impressive dominant roll taking on many established stars like The Foundation and Team Kurtis. After a very competitive match between these two impressive match, Nightmare was able to gain the TV Title and end Prince Darko's very short reign. I see his star heading for the sky if he keeps up on his path of rage.
Next week NAPW Matt Kurtis takes on Newfy Jack, David Banks beats down fellow wrestler Marcus Chamberlain, Brian Bruno comes back to ring Action after his loss at Cold Snap, Legion and Kodiak's feud may finally end in a brutal submission match, Next Generation try and make up for their loss this Tuesday against the talented, but shaky, team of The Foundation, Kyle Roberts returns after an embarrassing loss at Cold Snap but with his invigorating actions this Tuesday, he may have something more to add...The team of Krenshov and O'Brien look for Tag Gold, but have to get through the Two Monsters of Celtic Descent, The TV Tile is on the line when Nightmare puts up his dukes against enigmatic Dio Muerte and Chad Kurtis, Johnny Rotten's rotten luck has got himself tied against the odds of Untouchable members this Tuesday Castle puts his title on the line against the punk rock princess, Midnight Cowboy's first title defense goes against The Dooooooomriders, who have yet to see gold around their waste. and last and certainly not least Ravager takes on East Coast Sensation Lloyd Rees with Simply Beautiful as a "unbiased" special referee. And thats the Low Down for...tomorrow. Until then, I'm Lex Vain. A man among peasants, telling you to brush your teeth, snort some Sudafed and go ride go-karts (as Hulk Hogan would say...I think)
TNF
Team Kurtis vs. Maxx Extreme & Marcus Chamberlain
Coming off their big win at Cold Snap, even though they didn't do anything in this match, Team Kurtis once again comes out on top against the odd teaming of Marcus Chamberlain and Maxx Extreme. And may I just say that Marcus looked in great form against the brotherly duo of Team Kurtis. I look forward for Marc to take on outside scoundrel Adam Benjamin very, very soon.
Triple Threat
Jeff James vs. Jay O'Brien vs. Johnny Rotten
Ex-longest TV Champ seams to have had a change of faith, and loses to young punk upstart Johnny Rotten because of it. Not to mention the smart/despicable moves of Jeff Fox. And who gets hung up in the cross-fires? Why its the talented Jay O'Brien. If it were up to me, Jay would be NAPW champ by now. His talents are purely showing, it just goes to show that the fans know nothing about anything.
And how do you follow a unfortunate loss for Jay O'Brien? Oh, i don't know. Maybe make Stylin' Kyle a wreck on TV and humiliate Sir Winchell by making him wear an ugly old singlet and get ravaged by...well, Ravager. God, moving on.
Next Generation vs. Monsters of Hollyweird
Wow, this match was horrid. A parody of everything that Hollywood, entertainment and wrestling stand for. It is no surprise that I cannot stand the two small sprites of The Next Generation, but I think the Monsters have earned the title of wrestlers that I hate the most. And, furthermore, it should be known that any-one who does not think that these two monsters are The Celtic Assassins in disguise, should be in the remedial class. Not to mention that their movement and ability is limited. What's next, a Ketchup Casket Match??...wait
David Banks vs Kevin Kodiak
Just when I think things are not going my way, I am graced with the presence of The Chairman of NAPW, David Banks. Yes my friends, the greatest man to ever grace a NAPW ring, David Banks, was in action against the bear-like Kevin Kodiak. Unfortunately, Legion's interference went the wrong way and ended up costing Bank, what could have been a very dominant victory. It seems now that the former team of Kodiak and Legion are once again darkest of enemies.
Bruce Richards vs. Stone Zellor
Yes, this was like the coveted match between Clint and Stylin' Kyle. But much better, why you ask? Not because of the skillz of Stone (even though he has a lot of skillz). No, because of what happened after the match. Kyle Roberts...KILLED D-X! Oh what a day! I don't know how to express in words the amount of excitement I am retaining. So to you, Mr. Roberts, I say, "Thank You."
Simply Beautiful vs. Lloyd Rees
Yes, the feud that I thought was going to boil over and end at Cold Snap. Nope, that only seamed to fuel the hate between these men. And this time it was one on one. Today it was number one contender and future champion Lloyd Rees against a cocky punk who some-how keeps going up the ranking boards. Amazingly this was very back and forth, I swore Lloyd was going to take it in the first three seconds. Any-who, after some awesome and smart moves Lloyd's action accidentally gets smashed right back in his face. And then, if getting kick in the face with only a chair to cushion the blow was bad enough, Simply wins the match?! What?! That was more surprising than Kyle turning on Bruce!
The Untouchables vs. The DOOMRIDERS & Evan Cartwright
Well at first, I thought why was Evan teaming with Doomriders? It was sad to see Evan work on the side of good. But that almost instantly changed when he teamed with Chris Casino. Then again, the Untouchable leader was not to be trusted. And on impact, Evan Cartwright had his ankle sickly snapped by a sick flying elbow when it was sandwiched between a chair. After The Riders & Cartwright were taken care of, they decided to announce their new member. Ravager? Nope, just as quickly as it was revealed, it was announced to be mere rumors and the real fourth member was revealed. The man who can only be known by one name; Jay O'Brien...
Yes my dearies, Four Untouchables, a couple shock win and this show was in the bag. The real question is what will happen during the O'Brien/Castle match. Will this paradise be lost before its even begun, or will some-one's eye accidentally be jabbed so they can fall down and be pinned for three whole seconds? Only time and maybe an oracle or two can be sure...
Action!
Dez Carter vs. Newfy Jack
We started off with longtime wrestler for NAPW, Dez Carter against the relative unknown and new addition to our roster Newfy Jack. Though he may be new to NAPW, his moves are like a veterans and his unique arsenal that includes cod kissing, may be the shine that gets Jack noticed by the higher ups.
Dio Muerte vs. Sam Finn
After his amazing Cold Snap debut, Sam Finn looked out of his element against Dio in this one. Maybe it's because he feels that he's better than this or maybe he couldn't handle Dio's enigmatic and hard hitting offense. Don't look for too much out of Sam if he continues like this.
Thomas Young vs. Krusty Kid Paul
Another very short match for Action!, which leads me to believe that either all the cream is going to rise to the top or the backstage moral after Joseph's departure is down. Every-one knows that Joseph was a staple in setting up Action to be a dominant, yet less popular show compared to TNF where many could watch interesting spectacles including early Pure Honor Match's, The Television Title and impressive wrestlers on their rise including Lobo, Lloyd Rees, Rex Caliber, and numerous more wrestlers. Back to the match, Thomas took an impressive win against Krusty Kid Paul.
Prince Darko vs. Nightmare
At first I wasn't sure who to root for, but I soon saw the fire in Nightmare's eyes that was once missing a few weeks back. Now he is on an impressive dominant roll taking on many established stars like The Foundation and Team Kurtis. After a very competitive match between these two impressive match, Nightmare was able to gain the TV Title and end Prince Darko's very short reign. I see his star heading for the sky if he keeps up on his path of rage.
Next week NAPW Matt Kurtis takes on Newfy Jack, David Banks beats down fellow wrestler Marcus Chamberlain, Brian Bruno comes back to ring Action after his loss at Cold Snap, Legion and Kodiak's feud may finally end in a brutal submission match, Next Generation try and make up for their loss this Tuesday against the talented, but shaky, team of The Foundation, Kyle Roberts returns after an embarrassing loss at Cold Snap but with his invigorating actions this Tuesday, he may have something more to add...The team of Krenshov and O'Brien look for Tag Gold, but have to get through the Two Monsters of Celtic Descent, The TV Tile is on the line when Nightmare puts up his dukes against enigmatic Dio Muerte and Chad Kurtis, Johnny Rotten's rotten luck has got himself tied against the odds of Untouchable members this Tuesday Castle puts his title on the line against the punk rock princess, Midnight Cowboy's first title defense goes against The Dooooooomriders, who have yet to see gold around their waste. and last and certainly not least Ravager takes on East Coast Sensation Lloyd Rees with Simply Beautiful as a "unbiased" special referee. And thats the Low Down for...tomorrow. Until then, I'm Lex Vain. A man among peasants, telling you to brush your teeth, snort some Sudafed and go ride go-karts (as Hulk Hogan would say...I think)