Kodiak vs James vs Haggard

[Ryan Ro [NAPW]]

PROVINCIAL TITLE SHOT
TRIPLE-THREAT
Kevin Kodiak vs Jeff James vs Link Van Haggard

Provincial title shot on the line. Jeff James and Kodiak have come close in the past. Link Van Haggard impressed last week in the TAGSTRAVAGANZA when he teamed with Kodiak, a man who will be his opponent in this contest. Is there any residual tension between Kodiak and Haggard following their defeat? Jeff James could once again make a huge impact in the title picture with a win here, but Kodiak and Haggard are not to be over-looked. Could be the sleeper of the night, folks.

[Link Van Haggard]

The scene opens up in an old fashioned wood plank house with broken glass windows and everything in the room that we are in is very bland. There is Link Van Haggard the only colorful thing in the room he is laying knocked out in the middle of it also in the room is an old bed with grey sheets. The only thing that is brighter then Link is the light coming in from outside which looks like it was brought from the heavens. Then Link starts to get to his feet while he is rubbing his head and everything in the room is disarrayed. Link stumbles a few feet forward and is finally on his feet and when he looks next to him there is a pit bull there standing tall and proud.

Link Van Haggard: Where the (BLEEP) did this come from?

Link bends down and looks at the collar to see its name and its name is Tata.

Link Van Haggard: Tata? What type of name is that.

Then Tata begins to growl.

Link Van Haggard: I meant it was a great name now how did I get here?

Link begins to pace back and forth before deciding to leave the house with Tata not far behind. Now he comes out and he looks at everything and it is all fruity with little flowers everywhere. Then Link goes over to the house and sees a pair of black converse high tops there.

Link Van Haggard: Oh shit Tata we hit some one with this house.

Then a twinkling noise starts to come out of no where and Tracy dressed up in a fairy costume starts to descend from a zip line and when she reaches the floor she pulls out her magic wand.

Link Van Haggard: Well hello missy who are you?

Tracy: I'm Tracy the good witch of the east.

Link Van Haggard: Ok Tracy can you tell me where we are?

She giggles and smiles.

Tracy: Why you are in munchkin land home of the munchkins.

Link Van Haggard: All right that is nice and all but I would like to know how I can get home since I have a really important triple Threat match at Badder Blood and I need to train for it.

Tracy: To go home you need to see Oz he can take you home.

She starts to float away but then remembers something and comes back down.

Tracy: Oh yeah and those shoes over there snatch 'me they'll look good on you.

Link Van Haggard: All right see ya baby.

Link kisses her and then walks over to the house and pulls the shoes off of the man and when he does the most horrid feet ever appear and then they shrivel away as Link pulls on the shoes. Then a blast of smoke comes out of no where and a woman dressed pretty much like a whore steps out of the smoke and an ugly whore at that. She has fishnet stockings on he ugly wrinkled legs enough make up to cover the world and a shirt that should not be as short as it is. Her hair is as dark as coal allowing all of her grey hair's to be seen and she has a cigarette in her hand that she keeps taking puffs with.

Link Van Haggard: And who the (BLEEP) are you?

She speaks in a raspy voice.

Cherie: My name is Cherie and I'm the evil witch of the west and I want to know who killed my (BLEEP)ing brother? Was it....

She starts to cough.

Cherie: Was it.....

She continues to cough not able to say the sentence and with one dying breath.

Cherie: Was it you?

Link stops for a second trying to comprehend what she just said then he realizes it.

Link Van Haggard: Are you trying to accuse me of something bitch?

Cherie: Just wait until you get out in the open you better watch your back or I'll take you out.

She starts to do a maniacal laugh which then just turns into a fit of coughs as smoke appears and she disappears.

Link Van Haggard: Wow just wow.

Now Link is about to sit back and relax when he sees little heads start to pop out everywhere.

Link Van Haggard: Oh my god no, please god no.

Then little munchkins start to pop out of everywhere and surround Link in a circle he tires to back out but they are everywhere.

Link Van Haggard: They (BLEEP)ing found me these damn midgets.

Then one of the midgets stepped forward and were just going to call him Bob.

Bob: You have saved our lives we are eternally grateful.

Link Van Haggard: What are you talking about?

Bob: You killed her, the evil one.

Now he steps back into line and Link can sense what is about to happen next. They sing.

Munchkins: Ding Dong the Witch is dead....

Link Van Haggard: No! No (BLEEP)ing singing. Just tell me how to find Oz and then you guys can sing.

Then one of the munchkins steps out and he'll be named Larry.

Larry: Follow the red brick road.

Link stares at the yellow brick road in front of him.

Link Van Haggard: What red brick road?

Larry: Oh yeah it's the yellow brick road I was up late partying last night.

Link Van Haggard: And there is no singing until I am far away enough so I won't hear it or I will come back here and stick my foot so far up your asses I'll reach the moon.

Now Link starts to follow the road and they start to sing he just yells in the air and ignores them and continues to follow the yellow brick road. Then he reaches a crossroad and he doesn't know which way to go and then he sees hanging on a pole a guy who is dressed up in scarecrow clothes. Link jumps over the wood picket fence between him and the Scarecrow. Link walks up to him.

Link Van Haggard: What's hanging?

Link laughs at his play of words.

Scarecrow: Do you think that is funny man that was just corny.

Link Van Haggard: So why are you hanging here?

Link laughs again as Scarecrow slaps his hand against his face.

Scarecrow: So are you going to get me down from here.

Link then goes to untie the ropes and Scarecrow falls from the high distance but he lands on his feet like a cat. He takes a few steps before almost falling over right on his face but Link catches him. And dusts off his shoulders.

Link Van Haggard: You okay man, now I know you probably had a lot to drink last night but you need to be able to walk on your own.

Scarecrow: Shut up man I want to see you hang on a pole all your life and then just get up and walk.

Link Van Haggard: Yeah no need to have a bitch fit man.

Scarecrow: So man what brings you to these parts any way? We don't get much of your kind around here any way.

Link pauses for a few seconds trying to remember what he was doing here.

Link Van Haggard: I'm going to see Oz so he can get me out of this (BLEEP)ing nut land.

Scarecrow: All right I'm coming with you.

Link Van Haggard: Why.......

Scarecrow: Because I (BLEEP)ing can and I need to ask Oz for something.

Link Van Haggard: What?

Scarecrow: None of your business man.

Link Van Haggard: You tell me or I'll leave you here and I won't lead you there.

Scarecrow: I could hear those (BLEEP)ing midgets from here I know you have to follow the damn yellow brick road.

Link Van Haggard: I'll burn you then smart ass if you don't tell me.

Scarecrow: Alright I'll tell you but you can't tell anyone.

Scarecrow walks up to Link and whispers something in his ears.

Link Van Haggard: YOU DON"T HAVE A BRAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!

Scarecrow: Shut up!

Link Van Haggard: I'm sorry man do you need a hug?

Scarecrow starts to walk away ignoring Link.

Link Van Haggard: Wait up for me.

Link jogs so he can catch up with him.

Link Van Haggard: Now we are off to see Oz.

Link hooks his arm around the Scarecrows but the Scarecrow just pushes him away from him as Link starts to skip.

Scarecrow: How far way is this place anyway?

Link Van Haggard: I don't know the midgets just told me to follow the yellow brick road.

Now Scarecrow and Link walk in silence for a few minutes until they reach a spot where they see a tin man in between the trees. It turns out to be a guy dressed as a tin man and if you looked at it from far away he actually looked like he was made out of tin. He is frozen his hands are out stretched one holding an axe the other clenched in a fist.

Link Van Haggard: Ah look who we have here what's up man?

Link walks up to him and pounds his clenched fist.

Tinman:...... oil........oil.......oil.

Link Van Haggard: What was that?


Tinman: ......OIL!

Link Van Haggard: You want me to rub oil all over your body, you know that is Ca$h’s job but I will do it just this once.

Scarecrow is sitting against a tree this whole time with his head in his hands. Now Link starts to look for the oil can while it is right in front of him he searches all around and then a time card appears on the screen that says one hour later. Scarecrow is now sleeping against the tree Tinman has drool dropping from his mouth and then Link sees the can which was right in front of Tinman the whole time.

Link Van Haggard: I FOUND IT!!!!!!!!

Link does a little jig while Scarecrow jolts right up to his feet while all Tinman can do is open his eyes. Now Link walks over to Tinman and pours a little of the oil on Tinmans joints and then Tinman starts to stretch them out.

Tinman: Aw oh yeah that feels good don't stop. Yes! Yes! Almost there, almost there. Oh god yes that’s it!

Scarecrow just stares with a blank expression at both of them as Link backs away from Tinman and wipes his mouth.

Link Van Haggard: You better now man you can handle your self now?

Tinman: Yeah I'm fine now but can I ask where you guys are going?

Link Van Haggard: We are going to see Oz I want to get out of here and my friend here doesn't have a brain.

Scarecrow: Link you said you wouldn't tell anyone.

Link Van Haggard: Well I lied what are you going to do about it?

Scarecrow stands up and gets in Link's face.

Scarecrow: You want to go Link?

Link Van Haggard: Yeah let's go.

Link starts to walk away as Scarecrow falls to the floor in laughter.

Tinman: Can I go with you guys?

Scarecrow: Why are you just letting him go like that, I had to beg to go.

Link Van Haggard: Because I like him but if I could ask why do you want to see Oz?

Tinman: I don't have a heart I'm a ruthless son of a bitch.

Link Van Haggard: All right let's go now.

Then a fit of coughing comes out of no where and Link looks around to see where the noise is coming from and then right in front of him is Cherie the evil witch of the west.

Cherie: Ah I see you have got pretty far Link but you will not get any farther.

Then Cherie pulls her hands back and throws a water ball at the Scarecrow.

Link Van Haggard: Why did you do that?

Cherie: (BLEEP) I forgot that hay burns not wilts.

She starts to cough again and smoke starts to appear.

Cherie: I'll get you and your little friends too.

As those words ring in their heads she coughs more and she disappears in the smoke. Now Scarecrow stands in the middle of the forest soaking wet. Link now points at him and laugh.

Link Van Haggard: That bitch is crazy what ever we are wasting a lot of time let's go see Oz so I can get the (BLEEP) out of here.

Now they start to walk when they walk up upon a little cute bunny, Link and Scarecrow coo at him and then out of no where and axe comes down and the bunny heads falls off of its shoulders. And Tinman is standing above the bunny smiling.

Tinman: I told you I didn't have a heart man that will make a good rabbit soup.

Tinman is about to pick it up when Link slaps his hand away.

Link Van Haggard: We are not carrying a dead rabbit with us now let’s go.

Now they start to march away from the body of the dead rabbit and then not too soon after they reach a dark forest that is surrounded by trees and then they all move together and start to repeat the same thing over and over again.

All: (BLEEP)s, Bitches, and Whores oh my! (BLEEP)s, Bitches, and Whores oh my!, (BLEEP)s, Bitches, and Whores oh my!, (BLEEP)s, Bitches, and Whores oh my!

Then a body flies out through the woods and the Tinman is about to chop at it with his axe when Link holds out his hands to stop him. There stands dressed in a guy in a Lions costume. Link, Scarecrow and Tinman all scream in fear at the lion and because of their screams the lion screams back at them. Now they run in circles first the lion chasing them and then it ends up that they are chasing the lion. Then Link pins down the lion and the Tinman holds the axe to the lion’s throat.

Link Van Haggard: What are you doing here, are you an assassin?

The lion is speechless and is just making motions with his mouth.

Link Van Haggard: What's wrong cat got your tongue?

Link slaps his knee and laughs at his play of words as Scarecrow and Tinman groan at the poor attempt of a joke.

Link Van Haggard: Speak beast or it's off with your head.

Lion: Um I got lost in the forest so I heard people voices and I came to see who it was you guys screamed at me and scared me so I screamed. I chased you and then you chased me and that is how we got here.

Link Van Haggard: You can release him.

Link motions to the Tinman and he takes the axe away from his throat.

Link Van Haggard: Wait you’re a lion who is scared of a couple of humans.

The Lion looks down and rubs his arm.

Lion: Um yeah I am not that brave.

Link Van Haggard: You are the king of the jungle yet you are a coward. You have to be brave, honourable, and courageous to be a king.

Lion: You don't have to rub it in though.

Scarecrow: Hey Link he can come with us I mean Oz is giving me a brain, Sentinel a heart I bet you he could give this lion here some courage.

Link Van Haggard: Alright he can come with us I bet you we are almost there I can smell him.

They all turn and stare at him.

Scarecrow: Are you sure you’re still not high on that LSD?

Link Van Haggard: Yeah come on we have to go now.

Now they all start to walk and come into a clearing in the road and then they see it standing there Emerald City. It stands tall and strong and in front of them big and green. Then they all start to walk towards it which then turns into a jog and then they are full out sprinting when needles start flying at them from all directions. And the whole scene goes into slow motion as Link and company start to doge needles barely and then they finally come to the end and no more needles are firing at them.

Tinman: What the (BLEEP) was that?

Link goes over to a pile of needles picks one up and sniffs it.

Link Van Haggard: There was LSD in those needles; I think someone is trying to screw me out of my match at Monday Night Fights.

Scarecrow: Well if we don't get a move along you might not make it to your match on time at Monday Night Fights.

Then they all walk up to the door and knock on it, after about 5 minutes a Green Guys head peeps out through an opening.

Green Guy: Yes what would you fine gentlemen want?

Link Van Haggard: We need to see Oz immediately.

Green Guy: Nobody sees Oz.

The Green Guy goes back inside the peephole and closes it.

Link knocks on the door again and the Green Guy comes out through the peephole again.

Green Guy: Yes.

Link Van Haggard: You know what we want we want to see Oz.

Green Guy: Nobody sees Oz and that is final.

The Green Guy goes back into the peephole.

Link Van Haggard: (BLEEP)! I guess were going to have to do this the old fashioned way.

Lion: What's the old fashioned way?

Link backs up about ten feet from he door then runs at full speed at the door and runs into it and the door barely moves. The rest of them just stare at Link with blank faces.

Link Van Haggard: Are you guys going to help me?

Then they all assemble where Link was they all run at the door and it breaks down.

Link Van Haggard: (BLEEP) yeah! That's how you use team work.

Then in the middle of all the rubble is the Green Guy covered by the door. Link and the rest of them all start to walk through the hall way marked "This way to Oz". Then they reach the end where there are glass doors they push them open and in there is a Giant floating head and then a big booming voice speaks.

Oz: Who dare bothers the all great and powerful Oz!

Link Van Haggard: It is the 4 noble outsiders who have but only four requests.

Oz: Please state your request.

Link gets down onto his knees.

Link Van Haggard: Oh great Oz, I would like to be able to go home, my friend the scarecrow would like a brain, my friend the tin man would like a heart, and my friend the lion would like courage.

There is a great silence for 10 seconds and then out of nowhere.

Oz: I will grant you your wishes....

They interrupt him in the middle of his sentence, to celebrate.

Oz: DO NOT INTERRUPT ME, now I will grant your wishes if you bring me the evil witch of the west's cigarette.

Link Van Haggard: What that is impossible there is no way you can do that.

Oz: Do you question my verdict?

Link Van Haggard: No not at all I was talking about something else.

Link looks at the floor and shrugs.

Link Van Haggard: Alright we will do it there is no need to yell at us...

Oz: SILENCE! Now be gone.

Link, Scarecrow, Tinman, and Lion all march out of Oz's chamber with their heads down and then they march past the door where Green Guy is still knocked out from them busting down the door on him. Now they are outside again and they are dodging the needles as they fly by Link and his crew. Once again they get through the needles except the tin man has about 50 of them stuck to his side and it seems that they used him as a shield. Now as Tinman pulls the needles out of his side they all start to walk away from Emerald City until they reach a cross road. Where there is a sign which has an arrow that points two ways on one it says to Old Hags house on the other it says to Munchkin land and with out hesitation Link goes the way of the old hag. Now they are walking for about five minutes when they come upon a little house that looks pretty much like a crack house and Link and the rest are a little surprised.

Scarecrow: I don't think this is it Link.

Tinman: Yeah I think this may be a distraction.

Link goes and looks behind the house and all there is, is a side of a mountain.

Link Van Haggard: There is nothing behind this house let me go knock on it.

Link goes up and knocks on the door and the witch comes out with a bath robe on.

Cherie: Oh shit! You guys are here already.

She quickly closes the door and then 5 seconds later she comes back out in a black cloak cigarette in mouth.

Cherie: I see you have come to turn your self in.

Link Van Haggard: No we have come to request your cigarette that is all we ask of you.

Cherie: (BLEEP) no I've been smoking this same cigarette ever since I was a little girl, and you’re not going to take it away from me.

Link Van Haggard: What did you say bitch?

Link then slaps her and she falls to the ground then he unzips his pants and starts to piss on her and as he does she starts to melt.

Cherie: I'm melting! I'm meltinggggggggggggg.

She finally is just a puddle and Link picks up the cigarette from the ground and puts it in his pocket.

Link Van Haggard: You don't disrespect me bitch.

Then Link stomps in the puddle.

Link Van Haggard: Let's roll back to Oz so I can get out of this asylum.

Then Link and all of them start to run back to Emerald they all have withdrawals while going there as they trip on tree branches, fall into quick sand, and all sorts of problems occur to them but after much trouble they are finally back walking past the broken down door where Vinnie is still knocked out. Then they go to where Oz is and they present him the cigarette.

Oz: Thank you now you may leave.

Link Van Haggard: What the (BLEEP)? You promised you would grant our wishes.

Oz: I lied!

Link is pissed off now.

Link Van Haggard: Ah hell no.

Link spies a curtain out of the corner of his eye and goes toward it and pulls back on it to reveal Oz who is not there instead the Green Guy is there.

Then a voice comes over the pa.

Voice: Cut Link you did that too early.

Link Van Haggard: Well you know what, (BLEEP) you we’re done.

Now they just all grab a chair as Green Guy comes in with a cooler in his hands and they all pull out a bottle of beer.

Link Van Haggard: Alright so this week I have a triple threat match against Jeff James and Kevin Kodiak. James I don’t know very much about, but I tagged with Kodiak last week, so I know him pretty well. Either way It’s only going to end with my arm raised in victory, and the Provincial Title Shot will be mine!

Now they all clang their beers together as it fades out.

[Jeff James]

The scene opens up with a Taxi pulling up infront of an unfamiliar building. The back door swings open and Jeff James walks out in his working out attire. His eyes are closed and he calls for Saki. Saki then gets out from the passenger door and walks next to Jeff. . The camera pans from a frontal view to behind the two and they are standing infront of a gym. Jeff then opens his eyes and suddenly gets very happy.

Jeff James: (BLEEP)! I haven't been here in ages.

Saki: Well, I figured we needed to get you back into competing shape.

Jeff James: Never thought you'd bring us to the old gym.

Saki: Lets just get you ready.

Jeff James laughs and the two make their way to the entrance. Jeff opens the front door and we cut to an inside view of the gym. An extremely fit man stands at the front counter and waves to Jeff and Saki

Jeff James: Ken!

Jeff walks over to the counter

Jeff James: Hey man, whats up?

Ken: Nothing much. I thought you two pretty much died off.

Jeff James: Nah, we just moved to a closer gym. How's this place lately?

Ken: It's good. Business has actually picked up since Brian and your Brother left. We've even had more women join since Darko left!

Jeff James: Heh... Yeah...He's not my brother anymore.

Ken: What?

Jeff James: Long story.

Saki: Basically, Darko and Thomas stomped Jeff's face into steel steps and nearly broke his jaw.

Ken: ...Wow...

Jeff James: Yep. But thats all done now. We (BLEEP)ed 'em up real good.

Ken: We?

Jeff James: Yeah Sak- My partner Dio Muerte and I.

Saki: Don't you watch NAPW?

Ken: Meh, I stopped. It just got really boring.

Jeff James: Yeah, you can't catch it on TV anymore. That (BLEEP)head Winchell nearly left us without a fed.

Ken: Well, I'm not paying for shit.

Saki: Ken, look. Show up to the next show. Jeff over here is going to be in a match for a title shot.

Ken: Against?

Saki: Two nobodies. Kodiak and some Haggard guy.

Ken: I'll think about it.

Jeff James: Yo Saki, I need to get ready.

Saki: Yeah, we need to get his ass in shape.

They walk away from Ken and head toward the rest of the gym. They say hi to a few people and go all the way to the back. They open up the door and we cut to an inside view. A few punching bags here and there, a couple treadmills, some free-weights and machine weights and in the center of it all...A wrestling ring.

Jeff James: Well (BLEEP).

Saki: Ready kid?

Jeff James: Where is everyone?

Saki: Who knows.

Jeff slowly walks over to the ring and climbs in. He looks slightly uncomfortable. Saki slides in and Jeff leans back into the ropes

Jeff James: Yo, did you heal up good?

Saki: From the match?

Jeff James: Yeah.

Saki: Well, considering the shit they did to me. I'm pretty good.

Jeff James: I dunno man, my jaw has been bugging me.

Saki: Man up. It's not like this weeks competition is gonna phase you.

Jeff James: True. But man, that injury postponed alot of my plans. Hell, the Untouchables pretty much disbanded themselves so that little campaign against them is gone. Is Rees still the Provincial Champ?

Saki: Yup.

Jeff smiles, and as he does his face is overcome by a grimace as he grabs his jaw

Jeff James: Well...Looks like Lloyd is (BLEEP)ed.

Saki: Hm?

Jeff James: Man, this is the perfect opportunity to bring back my TV Title!

Saki: Oh god.

Jeff James: I'm serious! Jeff James is back and I need some gold. I'll be cutting Ravager some slack, since he has the Crimes on his ass...

Saki: Don't tell me your thinking...

Jeff James: I'm gonna beat Lloyd Rees. Take a bit of power off the Crimes. Then I'll get Dio. Then we'll beat Lloyd Rees and David Banks. Then we'll team up with Ravager... NAPW can actually put up a fight against the Crimes!

Saki: That's ridiculous!

Jeff James: How is it ridiculous? Our champ needs some help! Who better to come to his aid then the record-breaking Jeff James?

Saki: Dude, your coming off an injury that almost ended your career. A chaotic fight against your brother and your heading into a triple threat.

Jeff James: And? Haggard and Kodiak are nothing compared to me. Whoever booked this... They know Jeff James is the man to help NAPW! Lloyd Rees won't be able to beat me! Hell, he got lucky in that fatal four way. I'm telling you Saki, this plan is brilliant!

Saki: You do know having the Crimes against you is a bad thing right? Rex is the boss of NAPW. What makes you think you can defy his word?

Jeff James: Who says he can stop me?

Saki: Who says he won't fire you?

Jeff James: Who says he can stop me!

Saki: Your insane.

Jeff James: No Saki, I'm brilliant.

He gets off the ropes and points to his head while smiling. He then begins to stretch

Jeff James: Yo, when I get into this shit. Do I have your support?

Saki: Dude.

Saki lifts up his wifebeater showing Jeff James his scar from a stab wound

Saki: If I'm willing to take that. I'm pretty sure I can help you with the Crimes.

Jeff lets out a childish "YES!" and drops to the floor and begins doing push-ups

Saki: Although... It might mean the end of your career.

Jeff James: What!?

Saki: Yo, Rex has the ability book whatever the hell he wants. What is stopping him from getting the Crimes against Jeff James?
I mean shit. Your really good Jeff. But you might be a tad over your head here.

Jeff hops up to his feet and climbs to the top turnbuckle

Jeff James: Saki, Saki, Saki. I think you may of forgotten who I was.

Saki: Oh? Have I?

Jeff James: I'm Jeff James baby!

drops down to a seated position and lays back in a tree of woe position

Saki: May I ask, what the hell your doing?

Jeff James: Sit-ups. Plus, the ability to do this can help me greatly.

Saki: If they get you in that you can escape?

Jeff James: In order to become a great wrestler. You must know the ring, you must know your opponent, and you must be able to make split-second decisions that can make or break the match.
And when this Triple-Threat finally goes down. My opponents won't know what hit them. And when I get my title shot. I'll make an example out of Lloyd Rees and show the Crimes whats what.

Saki sighs and Jeff James begins to laugh. He finishes his sit-ups and flips backwards onto his feet. Him and Saki continue to talk and we fade to black

[Link Van Haggard]

The scene opens up and we see brown leather everywhere and as the camera zooms out we see Link lying in the back seat of a car that appears to be an orange ford mustang. As we look at the back seat we see that Link is passed out in the back seat with a bottle of champagne. As we keep zooming out we see that the car is in the middle of a dark murky forest. All of a sudden the car just turns on and it reverses out of the forest and back onto the main road. It goes back into drive and we start driving down the main road in the country side. As the car swerves in and out of traffic Link begins to stir in the back seat and he sits up rubbing his eyes. And as he stares out the window his blood shot eyes go wide from seeing the car being driven without anyone driving.

Link Van Haggard: Holy Shit!

Then a cold steely voice comes from the stereo system.

Car: Link please sit down and fasten your seat belt I'm taking you to your destination.

Link Van Haggard: Who the hell are you and how are you driving my car?

Car: My name is Jerry and I need you to fasten your seat belt immediately.

The speed of the car continues to increase as the Jerry goes faster and faster down the road picking up dirt as he goes and avoids hitting cars.

Link Van Haggard: Where are we going?

Jerry: Were going to the safe house now I need you to shut up and stay down.

Link Van Haggard: What safe house? Why do we need to go there?

As they continue their conversation the car peels down a brown clay road, past farm houses and past fields as the sun starts to rise.

Jerry: Listen I'm a computer program from the future that has been implanted in this car. I'm here to protect you because in the future you are the one to save the world and stop a atomic war.

Link Van Haggard: Oh shit really? Well you better keep me alive then Jerry. Who's coming after me, North Korea? Iraq? China?

Jerry: No it’s the United States of America.

As Link sits there speechless the car pulls into a drive way of a shack. As he goes into the shack the floor of the shack starts to stink and becomes a basement. As the lights start to flicker on in the basement we can see it’s a reinforced army bunker.

Link Van Haggard: So what happens in the future?

Jerry: Well you see after George Bush's term in the office was over he changed his identity totally and faked his death. Then after Hilary Clinton won the election and was up for reelection in four years against Jorge Bash that was George Bush's new identity and Jorge Bash won the election after they had a recount in Florida. And then Jorge Bash obsessed with power and stupidity decided to continue the war on terror Hilary ended after he left office. But this time he decided to attack North Korea and after that North Korea sent an atomic bomb at us and we sent one at them and soon world war 3 began and it was a nuclear war. And eventually there was a nuclear winter and everyone but a few underground civilizations perished. And one of those civilizations had the technology to send me back in time to come and protect you.

Link Van Haggard: So what do I have to do with all of this?

Jerry: Well you see...

Just then a huge explosion occurs as the shack above them is blown to pieces.

Jerry: Evasive action delta!

As those words echo Jerry pulls out of the bunker down a ramp in an underground passage.

Jerry: In a few years you will run somebody over in the road by accident it was their fault as the dived into the middle of the road, but that person is George Bush, and he was supposed to die there. But someone somehow knew what would happen and you were murdered the week before you were supposed to run him over. And that person right now is trying to kill you because he has figured out that I am here to protect you.

The car continues to drive down the passage and eventually reaches a path where we are entered into a clearing above ground.

Jerry: We have one more defensive position if we are attacked there we are done for.

Link Van Haggard: Is there anything I can do to help you.

Jerry: Just stay safe that will help me the most.

The car continues to drive on the country road then we reach a cave and Jerry drives in all the way to the back of it and as soon as he enters the mouth of the cave a reinforced wall closes behind him and as he continues to drive in the cave walls continue to close behind him. Jerry reaches the end of the cave and the final wall closes behind him and this appears to be a control room of some sort.

Jerry: Link get out of the car now!

Link Van Haggard: What's up Jerry?

Jerry: Just get out.

As Link gets out the screen in the room turns on and on the screen someone who closely resembles Arnold Schwarzenegger is on the screen. He sticks out his arm at the reinforced wall and it transforms into a rocket launcher he fires at the first of the walls and it explodes, pieces of the wall fly everywhere some even hit the man but he is unfazed. Then the wall inside the control room opens and Jerry drives through it.

Link Van Haggard: Jerry where are you going?

Jerry: It doesn't matter just make sure you run over any man that looks like George W Bush.

Jerry starts to drive and the walls closes behind him. As the man prepares to fire another rocket at a different wall Jerry opens the wall and starts to drive directly at him and right before he hits him as Link stares at the screen a blinding light takes over the whole screen and when the light vanishes there is nothing left no man no Jerry just a smoky crater. Then another blinding light comes and as we see what it is we can see a brown rooftop of a car and as we zoom out we see Link Van Haggard waking up in the back of a orange mustang with a champagne bottle in his hand.

Link Van Haggard: Wow I'm never drinking champagne and passing out in my car again.

Then we zoom all the way in on Links bloodshot eye and we fade to black.

[Kevin Kodiak]

camera opens on an old building in the distance, as the camera zooms in it is easily recognized as the old Hart homestead... the place where many a wrestler was born....
Kevin Kodiak walks into the picture and stands in the middle of the picture with the house in the background.

KK:"Well there it is.. the place where many a wrestler was made or broken, the place where it was determined if you had it or not to be in this business, the place where many entered and few exited the same.
It was unfortunate for me that I never got to train there, but I have been through the halls of the mecca and even met some of the Hart family. I have faced many a man who was moulded in there, and they alway had one thing in common...they never stopped coming, never took defeat as an answer, and always brought to the ring their best. I am exactly that.. I never stop, defeat is not a word in my vocabulary and I always bring 110% to the ring.

Kodiak turns and walks and the camera follows him as he moves to the left. Kodiak sits on a park bench and the camera zooms in.

KK: "Last week, in the tagfest I was thrown in the ring with one of the newest dudes here in NAPW. That guy was Link Van Haggard, and let me tell ya, we didnt have alot of time to work together to get down what we intended to do. But that guy sure learnt fast, and I was proud of the match we had, it was our bad luck that we ran up against two of the strongest teams in NAPW tag action. I dont think they expected waht they got from us. I have to tell ya any time Van Haggard you want to tag up, no probs. But now we have a bit of a problem presenting itself this week, last week my partner, this week my opponent. Looks like maybe I showed you the ropes too well and now the NAPW is giving you a shot at a title.
But first you have to get past the teacher. Most students think they
learnt it all from the master, but not known to you is that I always keep something back. This isnt the first time I have been thrown in the ring with someone I showed the game to. So this week in Calgary, Van Haggard I will show just what i forgot to show you. "

Kodiak gets up and again moves to have the Hart house in the background.

KK: "Van Haggard...see that place, you will never know what it took to go thru that training, nor will I, but one thing for sure, I have seen just what it takes, I have been to battle and back, I have been pounded, injured and beaten. But always bounce back. Yes last week we were partners, this week is a different story. Bring what you have, and I will be there as well. I look forward to teaching you a few more things, but this time it won't be in a training session, this time it will be for real."

Kodiak walks out of the picture and the camera fades to black.

[Jeff James]

We open up a few minutes from where we left off. Jeff James slaps a headlock onto Saki and sends him crashing to the ground. Saki quickly pushes Jeff off of him and bounces to his feet and throws a hard right which Jeff easily ducks. Saki turns around and WHAM jumping superkick!

Saki: (Rubbing his face) (BLEEP), you didn't HAVE to hit me.

Jeff James: Er... How can I practice if I can't hit you?

Saki: You can pretend to hit me!

Jeff James: Then it wouldn't be good practice.

Saki sighs and asks for them to take a break. Jeff nods his head and leans back into the ropes

Saki: (His face is a bit swollen) So are you actually planning on calling out the Crimes?

Jeff James: The second I win that title shot.

Saki: Your outnumbered though.

Jeff James: And?

Saki: If you get jumped its over.

Jeff James: AND?

Saki: Your insane.

Jeff James: Slightly.

Saki: (Laughs) By the way Jeff. Have you seen that shit Link Van Haggard put up?

Jeff James: The Wizard of Oz stuff?

Saki: Yeah.

Jeff James: To each his own.

Saki: Don't feel like talking shit today do you?

He gets off the ropes and walks to the center of the ring, dropping down in push-up fashion and begins his set

Jeff James: Nope.

He quickly pulls off 30 Push-ups and jumps back to his feet

Jeff James: Wanna practice?

Saki: (Putting his hand up to his face) Does it look like I wanna practice?

Jeff James: Your a bitch.

Saki: Why don't you go watch tapes or something?

Jeff sighs in disappointment and climbs out of the ring. He walks over to a TV with a metal folding chair opens up infront of it. A bag lies next to the chair and he pulls out a tape. Through further investigation you can see the words "Link Van Haggard" written with a black sharpie. He puts the tape into a VCR (which was conveniently made connected to the TV) He then sits in the chair and last week's TAGSTRAVAGANZA match comes to life.

O'Brady and Kodiak have taken their corners as Van Haggard runs off the ropes with a swinging neckbreaker, putting Thoes down. Gets two. Tag into the rough-living Kevin Kodiak. Van Haggard takes a wristlock and walks the top rope, flips off and catches Kodiak with a swinging DDT! And taht means Kevin Kodiak ... is going to the top rope? You're kidding, right? 262 pounds come flying off with a top rope splash to Al Thoes! [/b]

Jeff James: Hm...

Kodiak grabs an armbar and tags in Link Van Haggard! Haggard leaps from the apron to the top rope, springboarding off with the KENTA knee right into O'Brady's face! Stiff! Haggard with a standing moonsault, that gets two before Thoes breaks it up. Haggard is feeling it, the crowd's getting behind this kid here! He sends O'Brady to the ropes, WTF? The sitout spinebuster... not even. O'Brady easily blocks it with his 95 pound weight advantage, driving Haggard down to the mat. Knee strikes to the top of Van Haggard's head! Oh my goodness, O'Brady displaying a mean streak here tonight. He gets off Haggard and climbs to the second turnbuckle, coming off with a brutal double-stomp onto the ribs of Van Haggard. That's got to be all, one, two, th--- kick-out!

Jeff James: Well...

Van Haggard crawls between the man's legs! Van Haggard runs to the opposite corner and up to the top rope, MOOOONSAULT --- caught by Phoenix! TOMBSTONE --- Van Haggard kicks his legs like he's swimming and slides out behind! Just like against the Celts, he dropkicks Phoenix, sending the man sternum first into the turnbuckle. Phoenix is unfazed however, and turns around, swatting Haggard's second dropkick away. He picks the man up, hammers him, irish whip, clothesline, flying crucific again by Haggard! Except...

He doesn't get Phoenix over. Samoan Drop by Phoenix squashes Link. [/b]

He looks disgusted for a moment and hits the eject button. He closes the TV and walks back to Saki who has just managed to get some ice on his face. Jeff climbs into the ring and shakes his head for a moment

Jeff James: Yo, I'm all for respect and competition and shit. But Link Van Haggard sucks.

Saki: (Laughs) What makes you say that?

Jeff James: He can't even dodge a (BLEEP) move! All he does is leave himself open for attack.

Saki: Any proof?

Jeff James: Well, see... Link and I share a similar fighting style. We like to do high impact and high risk moves. But that type of fighting just asks for you to get hurt. What the hell are you supposed to do if you go for a 450 and your opponent just rolls out of the way? Y'know... I think I can teach him something.

Saki: Oh shit, not this again.

Jeff James: (Laughs) I think I can help him become better. I mean he can pull off the moves but it doesn't seem like he can take the precautions necessary to prevent a loss. I mean he went for a moonsault and received a tombstone piledriver for his efforts. Not to sound cocky or anything, but I could of easily avoided that. And WHY THE HELL would you try to spinebuster someone almost 100 pounds heavier than you? We all have limits and obviously he doesn't know his.

Saki: And how do you plan on teaching him?

Jeff James: Dude, I'm going to beat his ass senseless. Then after I get that title-shot. I'm thinking of recruiting an ally.

Saki: You...Just said he sucked.

Jeff James: That was a bit harsh. But the kid has potential. I don't wanna let it go to waste.

Saki: So you want to take out the Crimes, get back on top, respect your opponents, be the best you can be AND help people become better wrestlers?

Jeff James: ...Pretty much.

Saki: You never know when to quit do you?

Jeff James: What does quit mean?

Saki sighs and Jeff James begins to laugh as we fade to black

[Kevin Kodiak]

camera opens on a large parking lot, there are quite a few cars in the lot and as the camera swings around a large shopping mall is in the back ground. Many cars drive by and then a large red Dodge Ram 4x4 comes into the picture and pulls into an empty spot. The camera comes in closer and out steps Kevin Kodiak from the truck and the camera moves in.

KK: " Hey you guys seem to always know were I am going to be. It seems like you have a tracker device on my truck or something. But today I am just taking it easy, away from all the hoopla of this weeks match NAPW, and just trying to relax. But you guys work 24/7 and well it just so happens I have a few things to say about my match this week. Van Haggard, James and myself in there for a shot at a title. A three way dance where the winner gets a shot and the others have to start over again trying to prove themselves. "

Kodiak waves to a few fans who drive by and honk their horn

KK: " Now lets break it down, have a look at who is in there... we have Link Van Haggard who has made a big impression on the NAPW in his first match. But who was standing in his corner in that match? I think it was me! So part of his fame is due to what I did to showcase him. But now he is the next best thing since sliced bread, thanks to me. A guy who had never been in a real match, and now with a little tutoring now is on his way. But there is a third
party in this match this week .. Jeff James. Another up and coming rookie here in NAPW. Another guy who saw wrestling and it got into his blood.. a little training and now another guy on his way up.
NAPW must think I am a babysitter or something, or maybe I am their designated trainer, showing these up and comers the ropes and how to get better in their. Well I think this week's match will show you just what I have to say about that."

Kodiak starts to walk towards the mall and the camera is in front of him as he moves through the parking lot.

KK: "Here is how I see it, two new guys here, one vet who has travelled the world, one shot at a belt. I have been there and done it, in many feds and as well right here in NAPW where I have proven myself and had a few shots already. But for several reasons,
one of those belts would have been right here, around my waist. That's in the past, and now this veteran of the squared circle is now being tossed in with some green rookies, looking to make a mark and get that shot. Well we all know that experience plays a big part of the way things go. I am sure my many years, being part of ever type of match you can think of, and my recent trip to Japan for some pointers will all come in handy this week. I look forward to stepping in their with these two, I doubt they will be able to show me anything I haven't seen before, but lets just see what they can do. I have not looked past them and the shot at title. but I think I have a good shot at walking out with that chance in my back pocket. So Van Haggard and James, I will be ready, for what ever you got, bring it along, but remember the veteran isnt going down that easy to a few new kids on the block."

Kodiak reaches the doors to the mall, pulls it open and now goes inside, and the camera fades as Kodiak disappears into the rush of people.

[Jeff James]

The scene opens up a few hours before Badder Blood starts. Jeff James and Saki are found in the locker room with Jeff James getting in some last minute preparation. The two are talking and all of a sudden the locker room door swings open and Josh Reynolds barges in. Jeff looks at him dumbfounded and Josh begins to speak.

Josh Reynolds: Jeff! We're only a few hours away from Badder Blood and I've been told to interview you, so here we go.

Jeff James: Alright, shoot.

Josh Reynolds: Alright, tonight you'll be going against that lunatic Link Van Haggard and whoever the hell Kevin Kodiak is. Do you have any words for either of them?

Jeff James: As a matter of fact Josh, I do. Earlier this week, Kevin Kodiak put out a promo talking shit about Haggard and I. Although his shit talk really meant nothing to me, one thing caught me by surprise.

Josh Reynolds: And that was?

Jeff James: Well, nearing the end of his promo, Josh Reynolds had the nerve to call me "Another up and coming rookie here in NAPW" Now honestly, how the (BLEEP) is he going to call me a rookie? I've broken records and I've ended records. To make this easier for you to comprehend, I, Jeff James am the farthest thing from an "up and coming rookie"...

Josh Reynolds: That's true Jeff, you are the most dominant and longest reigning TV Champion in NAPW history. At one point you also held the record for most consecutive title defenses and pretty much had wrestlers lining up to "dethrone" the champ. Not to mention that you ended Yellow Chickens undefeated streak.

Jeff James: Exactly! But see, there is also a positive way to look at this. As you all know, I am not even near the prime of my career. I am only 20 years old and I've already made myself a force to be reckoned with here in NAPW...Kevin Kodiak is what? 50? 60? I mean shit. I don't think anyone even knew he still wrestled here. What real accomplishments does he have?

Josh Reynolds: None that I know of.

Jeff James: My point. Kevin Kodiak is just here to gain some life in his already dead career. Me? I'm here to get that title match against Lloyd Rees and show the world that not even the Crimes will be capable of stopping me.

Josh Reynolds: Yeah, that's what I wanted to talk to you about. This last week you've been talking about how your going to take care of the crimes. Your one man and have only a few allies. How do you plan on taking them out?

Jeff James: Well obviously if I don't plan everything out perfectly I'm going to be overwhelmed. They'll simply resort to jumping me and I'll come out beaten and bloodied. But I'm taking these boys out one by one and I'm starting with Lloyd Rees and his Provincial Championship.

Josh Reynolds: You must not forget Lloyd Rees history though. He's held countless titles and has gone toe to toe with the best of them. How are you going to prepare for this war against the Crimes?

Jeff James: I'm going to do what I always do. I'm going to go out there to win.

Josh Reynolds: That's it?

Jeff James: Well, if I told you my ENTIRE plan, it wouldn't work now would it?

Josh Reynolds: Well, It seems like your ready for Kevin Kodiak but what about Van Haggard?

Jeff James: That guy doesn't even know where the hell he is. Didn't he think he was in the wizard of oz or something? Hell, it wasn't even worth paying attention to.

Josh Reynolds: Well Jeff, I think I'm going to have to leave you be. You've got a hell of a triple-threat coming up tonight. Not to mention, Lloyd Rees might want to take out his future opponent a bit early.

Jeff James: If Lloyd Rees wants to go at it tonight? He can just interfere in my (BLEEP) match if he wants to. Hey Josh, do me a favor.

Josh Reynolds: What?

Jeff James: Be sure to interview those two after I whoop 'em.

Josh Reynolds: Sure thing.

Josh Reynolds leaves the room and Jeff James gets back to preparing for his match as we fade to black