Post by Bruce "The Beast" Richards on Mar 16, 2007 21:13:30 GMT -5
(Bruce Richards sits at his desk in his home office. He types a little into his computer, absent-mindedly, his mind obviously somewhere else. He flicks off his computer monitor and directly addresses the camera.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: Hey there, NAPW fans. Sorry I kept you guys waiting. I was just checking out the latest goings-on at the NAPW.ca message boards. (He nods.) Yeah, I'm a frequent lurker over there; I don't really post very much, but it's nice to see what the fans think, as well as what the NAPW wrestlers masquerading as fans think. I'm talking to you, zellorama (very obviously winking), hint hint.
(He cracks his knuckles and smiles as he continues.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: And what's generating the most buzz online? Well, of course there's the TV/Provincial title unification. Those four boys put on a heck of a show, I'll admit. And the ladder match showdown between "The Show" and LDK was definitely the highlight of the night. Of course, that's not the only big news. My old buddy Bob Ravager shocked the wrestling community by actually wrestling a successful defense of the NAPW Heavyweight Title against Simply Beautiful. That boy might prove to be a half-decent wrestler yet. And of course, there's the shocking news that Kurt Castle's been released, setting The Untouchables back one unwashed manchild, bringing the total down to two. However will Chris Casino manage with such a lackluster crew? Only time will tell.
(Bruce sighs and shakes his head.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: There's one other notable news item that's making the rounds. The seemingly unstoppable winning streak of Kyle Roberts. Yes, since he betrayed the only people who cared about him and started preening about like a dunken peacock, he's been racking up the wins. At Road for the Gold, he takes out Sam Finn, everyone's second-favourite schizophrenic - what, you people forgot about the great Bickle so soon? - with a skillfully applied Beartamer, and then he does the same to Nightmare, the biggest choke artist to ever win the TV Title. Two matches, two decisive victories. Yes, Kyle Roberts certainly looks like he's on a roll.
(Bruce leans over the table; although he's still smiling, we can see a few cracks in the façade, the anger and aggression slowly breaking through.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: But what of his former friend and tag-team partner, Bruce Richards? Well, let's see. Three weeks ago, he was supposed to wrestle, and his opponent never showed up. For those of you with short memories, that absentee opponent was no other than Kyle Roberts. Then, last week, another singles match, against the angry, talented Brian Bruno. Ah yes, it was to have been a barn-burner of a match. If only Bruno had shown up. I had to do my best to entertain the crowd by manhandling Grade "A" Alberta Attitude, but it's not really the same now, is it? The fact is, Kyle's been gaining momentum, while I've been barely treading water.
(Bruce Richards quickly gets up and walks towards the front of the desk.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: So this week, I have another opponent. A rather skilled opponent at that. Jeff James, the longest-reigning TV Champion ever. A man who, after failing twice before, proved that the third time was a charm by getting a win over me back in January. Sure, it was a DQ victory, but I'm not one to sell the man short. He's got talent. He's got skill. I respect that. However, I have one question for him. Will he even bother to show up?
You see, I'm not exactly an easy guy to go up against in the ring. There's a reason they call me "The Beast". You step in that ring with me and I'll put you through the ringer. Everyone knows that even though you might be lucky enough to get a pinfall on me, you're going to go through hell to get it. And that's when I don't have anything to prove, or any extra motivation. But this match? Against Jeff James, after two weeks of no-shows? I've got plenty of motivation. I need a good warm-up match before I face Kyle at Sole Survivor, and I sure didn't get one last week. I need a win against competent opponents; again, didn't get that last week. And most importantly, I need a match that's going to remind everyone that I'm ready to move up to the next level. I need a match where I pull out the stops, where someone steps into the ring and has to be carried out. Are you the guy who's going to give me that match, James? Or are you going to chicken out, just like the two guys that came before you? You'd probably be smart to duck out on Tuesday night, but for my sake? (Bruce smiles, baring his teeth.) I hope to god you don't.
(Fade out.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: Hey there, NAPW fans. Sorry I kept you guys waiting. I was just checking out the latest goings-on at the NAPW.ca message boards. (He nods.) Yeah, I'm a frequent lurker over there; I don't really post very much, but it's nice to see what the fans think, as well as what the NAPW wrestlers masquerading as fans think. I'm talking to you, zellorama (very obviously winking), hint hint.
(He cracks his knuckles and smiles as he continues.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: And what's generating the most buzz online? Well, of course there's the TV/Provincial title unification. Those four boys put on a heck of a show, I'll admit. And the ladder match showdown between "The Show" and LDK was definitely the highlight of the night. Of course, that's not the only big news. My old buddy Bob Ravager shocked the wrestling community by actually wrestling a successful defense of the NAPW Heavyweight Title against Simply Beautiful. That boy might prove to be a half-decent wrestler yet. And of course, there's the shocking news that Kurt Castle's been released, setting The Untouchables back one unwashed manchild, bringing the total down to two. However will Chris Casino manage with such a lackluster crew? Only time will tell.
(Bruce sighs and shakes his head.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: There's one other notable news item that's making the rounds. The seemingly unstoppable winning streak of Kyle Roberts. Yes, since he betrayed the only people who cared about him and started preening about like a dunken peacock, he's been racking up the wins. At Road for the Gold, he takes out Sam Finn, everyone's second-favourite schizophrenic - what, you people forgot about the great Bickle so soon? - with a skillfully applied Beartamer, and then he does the same to Nightmare, the biggest choke artist to ever win the TV Title. Two matches, two decisive victories. Yes, Kyle Roberts certainly looks like he's on a roll.
(Bruce leans over the table; although he's still smiling, we can see a few cracks in the façade, the anger and aggression slowly breaking through.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: But what of his former friend and tag-team partner, Bruce Richards? Well, let's see. Three weeks ago, he was supposed to wrestle, and his opponent never showed up. For those of you with short memories, that absentee opponent was no other than Kyle Roberts. Then, last week, another singles match, against the angry, talented Brian Bruno. Ah yes, it was to have been a barn-burner of a match. If only Bruno had shown up. I had to do my best to entertain the crowd by manhandling Grade "A" Alberta Attitude, but it's not really the same now, is it? The fact is, Kyle's been gaining momentum, while I've been barely treading water.
(Bruce Richards quickly gets up and walks towards the front of the desk.)
BRUCE RICHARDS: So this week, I have another opponent. A rather skilled opponent at that. Jeff James, the longest-reigning TV Champion ever. A man who, after failing twice before, proved that the third time was a charm by getting a win over me back in January. Sure, it was a DQ victory, but I'm not one to sell the man short. He's got talent. He's got skill. I respect that. However, I have one question for him. Will he even bother to show up?
You see, I'm not exactly an easy guy to go up against in the ring. There's a reason they call me "The Beast". You step in that ring with me and I'll put you through the ringer. Everyone knows that even though you might be lucky enough to get a pinfall on me, you're going to go through hell to get it. And that's when I don't have anything to prove, or any extra motivation. But this match? Against Jeff James, after two weeks of no-shows? I've got plenty of motivation. I need a good warm-up match before I face Kyle at Sole Survivor, and I sure didn't get one last week. I need a win against competent opponents; again, didn't get that last week. And most importantly, I need a match that's going to remind everyone that I'm ready to move up to the next level. I need a match where I pull out the stops, where someone steps into the ring and has to be carried out. Are you the guy who's going to give me that match, James? Or are you going to chicken out, just like the two guys that came before you? You'd probably be smart to duck out on Tuesday night, but for my sake? (Bruce smiles, baring his teeth.) I hope to god you don't.
(Fade out.)