Post by Chris Casino on Feb 17, 2007 12:20:34 GMT -5
Casino's Penthouse. Vegas.
The bedroom of Chris Casino is quiet this morning. In fact the only sound we can hear is that of someone snoring. The covers start to fold back and Chris Casino slowly sits up. He yawns and stretches trying to wake himself up. He looks over at the figure bundled under the covers next to him and he smiles. Casino throws back his half of the covers and we see he's dressed in silk boxers. He runs his right hand through his ruffled bed hair and stops. A quizzical look appears on Casinos face as he slowly takes his hand from his head and looks at it. A wedding ring. Casinos eyes nearly pop out of his head as he looks at his hand in disbelief.
Casino: What. The. (BLEEP)?
Casino pulls the covers off of the person laying next to him with one tug. The woman we saw before, the attractive African American woman is sleeping contently. She's clad in a black silk nightie and she snores softly as Casino looks at her.
Casino: No...This is just a dream. Some kinda mistake.
Casino reaches over, finds the womans right arm and pulls her hand into view. She stirs and her eyes flutter open. Casino is looking at her hand with his mouth open. She has a wedding ring also. Just like the one Casino is wearing.
Woman: Hmmmmmm. Morning baby.
Casino practically jumps out of bed and looks at the woman.
Casino: What is this!?
He holds up his right hand to show the woman the gold band around his ring finger. She sits up in bed, and even in the early morning hours she's drop dead gorgeous. She smiles sleepily and laughs.
Woman: Silly...You really did have to much to drink last night didn't you?
Casino: What are you talking about? I remember doing that promo for the dirty Canadians and then you and I having some drinks, then we....We....
Woman: We went out on the town. You were pretty tore up.
Casino: We did? I was?
Woman: (frowns) You don't remember last night?
Casino: I...No. No I don't.
The woman laughs playfully and lays back down on the bed.
Woman: Silly we got married last night at the "Hunka Hunka Burning Marriage chapel"
Casino staggers back like he's bed shot.
Casino: We...Got married?
Woman: Yes now come to bed...It's our honeymoon.
.
The morning calm is broken by a horrific shriek.
Casino: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!
Back To Business. The Gym.
Chris Casino patiently watches as several people set up a wrestling ring. We're in a private gym that Casino just happens to own 25% of. As he watches the ring being set up his manager, Raul Havok watches him.
Havok: So...Let me get this straight. You got married last night?
Casino: Evidently. I even went to that chapel and they showed me the records. Hell Monique even showed me the pictures of us standing in front of the chapel. She was given away by a black Elvis. What kinda crazy shit is that?
Havok: Wait...Who is Monique?
Casino: That, uh, would be my wifes name.
Havok: Look you got to get this annulled! Tell the judge it was a mistake, that you were drunk.
Casino: I know! As soon as Monday arrives I'll be....
Havok: In Canada.
Casino groans and holds his head.
Casino: Okay fine when I get back then I'll go to court and get it annulled. What a mess.
Havok: She's going to want money Chris. Lots of money.
Casino: I know. I'll pay her off.
Havok: She's not a uh...Hooker is she?
Casino: What? No. She's a model. We meet a few weeks ago at a party. I don't pay women to have sex with me you freak.
Havok: What about that time you took me to the Moonlight Bunny Ranch?
Casino smirks. Maybe for the first time today.
Casino: Look, if you come to Vegas you have to go to the Ranch. It's like a law or something.
Havok: Right.
One of the workers walks over to Casino and Havok.
Worker: The ring is all set up Mr. Casino.
Havok slaps his client on the back.
Havok: Time to get to work.
Casino and Havok get up and start walking towards the ring.
The DOOMriders & Evan Cartwright
"I often wonder how people like Billy Kryenik and Tommy Deathrow get ahead in this business. They have no technical in ring skills. Unless you count a chair to the head as a wrestling move. Maybe the fans and the promoters love them for the simple fact that they're willing to sacrifice their bodies for a couple bucks in those garage matches they often engage in. I on the other hand can lay claim to being the best technical wrestler not only in NAPW but in all of wrestling. Evan Cartwright can call himself 'Perfection' but we all know that it was I who made him into a star. Look at him now. Teaming with the Doomies out of desperation. What a pity."
Chris Casino sits on the ring apron and looks tired. He's in his ring gear and covered in sweat. The morning sparring session has come to an end and our Pure Honor Champion looks pooped. No doubt the events from last night didn't help either. He takes a sip from a bottle of water and starts to laugh.
Casino: Where oh where have the Doomies and Cartwright gone? Do they even know they have a match for Tuesday Night Fights? Maybe they're off someplace doing some quality male bonding. Here we are, the first show since the Cold Snap PPV and the opponents for The Untouchables have all but vanished. I'm starting to think that maybe we should issue an Amber Alert to help find your asses.
Casino: Evan, I can't tell you how much it sucks to once again have to be the man who rains on your parade. I'm sure you're looking for some momentum going into your re-match against Ravager but you won't get it against us. If anything you'll end up like your two misfit buddies. Broken and bloody. I can only hope that when it's all said and done you realize what a mistake it was that you refused to join me in The Untouchables.
Casino: As for Billy and Tommy...What can I say? Payback is a bitch boys. You beat me and Kenny in that No Holds Barred match but this week it's all about wrestling. Something neither of you know much about. Hell I suspect Tommy can't even spell wrestling. While you managed to knock down The Untouchables at the PPV we've gotten back up, dusted ourselves off and are ready to whip your asses.
Havok walks over and gives the stink eye to the NAPW camera crew.
Havok: We need to go champ, we have a meeting to attend to.
Casino: Alright.
Casino takes one last look at the camera and smiles a big toothy grin.
Casino: DOOMriders, Evan. At Tuesday Night Fights The Untouchables will get our vengeance...Plus a little extra. See you mooks soon.
Casino waves to us as we cut to black.
* cut to a commercial for the new Tommy Deathrow action figure from ChrisCasino.com. Push the button on it's back and hear it say "my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard!" among others! *